Pokémon Gray: Special Baron Von Stupor Edition
by Agent Baron
Summary: Baron Von Stupor embarks on an amazing journey throughout the land of Kanto! Can he successfully attain all eight badges and become a pokémon master? Read and find out!
1. Prologue

"Chapter 1: Prologue"

By: Von Stupor

"…But I have to have a pokémon!" cried Ash Ketchum.

Ash was a boy of average size and build, and sported white shoes, blue jeans, and a black T-shirt. He also bore a red vest and green gloves with their fingertips cut off. He had jet black hair and on his head, he wore a red and white baseball cap with a unique insignia on its front.

"Now Ash, calm down. I do have one left, but there's a slight problem with this one," said an aged professor.

"I'll take it, please!"

"Well, alright. I have faith in you, Ash."

"Alright! Thank you so much, Professor Oak!"

Professor Oak pulled a pokéball with a lightning bolt on the front out of a machine. He pushed the button on the front and out popped a furry, yellow creature.

"Pikachu!" it chirped.

"Ash, meet Pikachu," said the professor.

"Wow!" exclaimed Ash. "Nice to meet you, Pikachu!"

Ash reached to pick it up and it growled at him. Ignoring its less than subtle hint, he embraced it anyway.

"Now Ash, be careful," warned the professor. "Pikachu doesn't quite know you yet, and being an electric-type, he can have quite a—"

Just then, Pikachu released a charge of energy that shocked both the professor and Ash.

"…shocking personality," the professor finished, emitting smoke.

Ash emerged from the lab to be greeted by cheering town members, led by his mother.

"Oh, Ash, I'll miss you so much. I never thought this day would come so soon…" she whimpered.

"Don't worry Mom, I'll be fine," replied Ash.

After a few more farewells, Ash departed on his great pokémon adventure. A short ways down the road, he found a pond. There was a fisherman nearby, fumbling with some things in his lap.

"Hi!" Ash greeted him. "What are you doing?"

"I just caught the biggest magikarp I've ever seen, and he's right here, inside this pokéball!" he replied.

"Wow! Can I see it?"

"Sure, how about I show it to you in a pokémon battle?"

"Wow, sure! My first pokémon battle!" he whooped, setting his knapsack down. "Whaddaya say, Pikachu?"

"Pika!" grunted Pikachu, and stuck his tongue out at Ash.

"Alright, let's go!" said the fisherman. "I'll choose my newly caught Magikarp!"

The fisherman threw his pokéball and out came a rather large magikarp.

"I choose you, Pikachu!" cried Ash as Pikachu simply turned his back.

"Now, Magikarp! Use your Tackle attack!"

Magikarp flopped over and brushed Pikachu pathetically. Irritated, Pikachu loosed a jolt of electricity that knocked the opposing magikarp out cold.

"Arrrgh, magikarp are always so weak! Return!" ranted the fisherman, returning the Magikarp to its pokéball.

"Yeah, I just won my first pokémon battle!" cheered Ash.

"You beat me fair and square, here's your prize money."

The fisherman then sulkily walked away. As Ash was counting his money, he noticed a dark shadow looming over him. Pikachu looked over his shoulder, terrified. Ash turned around and looked up to see a large, serpentine creature.

"Wh-wh-what is that?" whimpered Ash and pulled out his pokédex.

"Gyarados, the atrocious pokémon," buzzed the computer. "Very aggressive and violent, it will not hesitate when attacking humans."

Ash took a few steps back, and as he turned to run, the Gyarados shot its head down and slurped up Ash in a single gulp. Pikachu ran away in fear.

About an hour later, a man came traveling down the road. He wore white tennis shoes, blue jeans, and an orange T-shirt with a single blue stripe that stretched around his ribcage. Covering his face was a purple heart-shaped mask. It had huge, piercing, yellow eyes with spikes distributed decoratively around the edges. Around his neck, he bore a heavy, slate colored winter coat, fashioned like a cape.

Accompanying this man was a large rat that walked upright. It was roughly two-thirds the man's height and was of a light brown color, save a large white spot on his belly.

"Say," said the rat, sniffing the air. "I smell food…"

"I have been taught that it is dangerous to trust food that which is found in the wilderness," commented the man in reply.

"It's coming from that bag, you dolt. Smells like sandwiches."

"Is it not still found in the wild?"

"Ah, shut up and help me shnuffle through it."

"Packrat, you cannot do that!" gasped the man. "'Tis not yours!"

"Oh, come on, Stupor! Maybe the previous didn't owner didn't want what was in it. Besides, their loss is our gain, eh?"

"Well, I am unsure whether one would leave a pokédex of all things behind or not…" replied Stupor, picking up a pokédex found near the bag, opened and lying in an awkward state. "This bag must belong to someone who has lost it. Be what it may, 'Tis our duty as human beings to return this luggage to its rightful owner, so as to prevent their further despair over the mysterious disappearance of their tighty-whities!"

"Ahem, well _I,_ however, am _not_ a human being, therefore it is _not_ my duty to return this baggage to its rightful owner so as to prevent yadda yadda yadda, so if you don't mind, I have some spelunking to do."

"Packrat, stop it!" cried Stupor, slapping at Packrat's shoulder repeatedly.

"_Alright, Alright!_ Stop hitting me for crying out loud! Fine, I'll help you return it, but I'm gonna demand a reward! Don't think I won't, because I will, and they don't comply, then hoo boy! It'll be a dark day if I ever get my claws on them!" Packrat rambled as the tandem continued their journey with the freshly added luggage.


	2. Pissed Off Packrat!

"Chapter 2: Pissed Off Packrat!"

By: Von Stupor

"Viridian Gym is… closed?" Von Stupor asked an old man in front of the building.

"Yep… one day the leader just vanished. No one has seen him since," replied the man.

"What was his name?"

"I… don't know."

"What did he look like?"

"I don't quite recall."

"Where did he live?"

"I'm sorry, I don't know."

"What is your name?" asked Packrat.

Von Stupor elbowed him in his arm.

"I'm… unsure…"

Rubbing his arm, Packrat gave Von Stupor an 'I Told You So' look.

"Very well, then," said Von Stupor, stretching. "Thank thee for thy time!"

The old man looked at him strangely and walked away.

"I'm telling you," Packrat said. "The old fart's senile."

"Must you be so cruel?"

Just then, the two realized that a young boy was yelling at them.

The boy sported a lavender sweater and black pants. His straight brown hair was spiked forward and worked its way up from the back of his head.

"Eh?' grunted Von Stupor in confusion.

"Who are you and why should I care?" Packrat asked sharply.

"Huh? A talking pokémon?" the boy squeaked, surprised.

"What the… I'm not a pokémon, you walking pincushion!"

"Yeah… right. That's a pretty sharp tongue for something caught by Ash Ketchum, ha ha!"

This confused the two even more.

"I… am not this Ash you speak of…" commented Von Stupor.

"Don't think you can fool me by hiding your embarrassment under that mask, I can recognize that dumb knapsack anywhere!"

"Ah! I see your error! I am Baron Von Stupor, and this bag is one I found on the trail to this city!"

"Wa ha hah! You kill me, Ash— oh, I mean 'Baron Von Stupor', you really do. I'll give you credit; you can be a pretty funny liar when you really want to. Maybe you should give up training pokémon and do a comedy routine! You know how they say you've gotta stick with what you're good at, huh?"

"Hey, just who do you think _you_ are!" snapped Packrat. "Hey there, Mr. I-Just-Touched-An-Electromagnet, why are you busting our chops when you're just now catching up!"

"Well, if I _must_ refresh your memory, I am Gary Oak, grandson of Professor Oak and childhood rival of Ashy-boy here! As for catching up, I think _you're_ the ones who are behind, because I already have _three_ pokémon gym badges and decided to take a Seagallop Ferry here from Vermilion City to see how far behind you are, and here I find you, _just now_ learning that Viridian City's gym has been shut down! How pathetic. Anyway, I think I've said enough. Smell you later, Ash— and hey! Try to keep up. Ha ha ha ha ha!"

Gary then walked away laughing to himself. Packrat began to dash after him but Von Stupor snatched him by the scruff of his neck.

"We have more pressing issues at hand, Packrat!" he told the animal.

"What can possibly be more pressing than beating the life out of that prick?" Packrat snapped back, struggling.

"We now know much of the boy this bag this belongs to!"

Breaking Von Stupor's grip, he asked, "…So?"

"This bag belongs to a boy named Ash Ketchum, not much older than Gary who just rubbed our noses in our sloth-like behavior. He aspires to be a master pokémon trainer, as does his rival, quiaff? Therefore he will be racing this Gary Oak to the site of the Pokémon League, also known as Indigo Plateau. If we were to follow them on this journey, we would wind up stalking this Ash Ketchum straight into the Pokémon League! Even if he were to arrive before us, the competition shall not start until a predetermined day, leaving us with plenty of time to find him! Even if all else fails, we'll have to meet him throughout the competition!"

"Okay, that sounds all fine and way outta our way, but you're not quite reading the fine print, Stupor! That's _if_ you're good enough to get all eight badges in Kanto and _if_ you make it to the league in time and _if_ Ash gets to the league at all and _if_ he doesn't get eliminated in the league and _if you_ don't get eliminated in the league! Think about the odds that all of this is gonna fall right into our lap! There's too many variables for this to be a successful mission. Besides, have you forgotten that we're here on vacation, that we're here to relax? You're wanting to throw our entire six week vacation out the window to return a _bag?_ Think about it, you're returning a stupid bag! It's a _bag!_"

"There's stuff inside…"

"Yeah, _replaceable_ stuff!"

"You're making it seem like that's the only reason why I want to go on this adventure."

"Oh, well, what is your ulterior motive, then?"

"Well, there is good money in it, should we be successful, and it could be fun! I mean, what else are we doing besides aimlessly exploring? Might as well do something along the way, eh?"

"I guess, but where do you intend to get your first pokémon from? Don't they get assigned or something? You can't battle without a pokémon."

Von Stupor stared at Packrat and said, "That Gary character sure seemed fooled when he saw you. I wonder…"

"Huh? Me? You're kidding. You have to be."

Von Stupor continued to stare.

"Ha ha, nice try, Stupor, but you're not getting me to be your little _poe-kee-mans_. …Stop staring at me, man, I'm not gonna do it! …Stop staring at me, dang it! …I'm warning you, cut it out! Stop it! _Stop it, right now!_ _Grrrrr, why am I so damn loyal!_"

"You're too kind, volunteering like that, Packrat."

"If it was for anyone else, I wouldn't do it, you got that!"

"Ha ha. Our next destination is Pewter City, whereupon we shall challenge its respective gym leader and attempt to win our first badge! The only clear route would be through Viridian Forest, and being as it is nearly nightfall, 'twould be best to rest our senses first."

"Yeah, whatever."


	3. PokéPackrat!

"Chapter 3- PokéPackrat!"

By: Von Stupor

"Okay, Stupor, I have to ask…" said Packrat, a bit agitated. "Why we came into this natural maze instead of just taking Diglett's Tunnel to Vermilion?"

"There was a tree blocking the way. It looked like a pokémon could CUT it! But alas, I have not a pokémon that knew how to CUT…" replied Von Stupor.

"That's what a machete is for, or even a hatchet! I probably could have pulled it up!"

"That, my friend, is against the laws of the universe."

The two had been traveling through Viridian Forest for some time now. It felt like they were going in circles, but according to the bug catchers along the way, they were heading towards Pewter City. Von Stupor was making lots of money by battling the bug catchers. As they sent out their Caterpies and Weedles, a single swift kick from Packrat did them in.

It was nightfall before the two emerged from the darkness of the forest.

"'Tis a tad late for our first gym battle…" commented Von Stupor.

"Pah! Not a problem!" Packrat spouted. He pointed to the side and said, "There's the gym! Follow me!"

They wandered over the gym's back door, where its leader actually lived.

"Who's gonna wake up? Let's find out!" Packrat sang, and then pounded on the door with both paws.

Many kids' voices were heard inside the home. Something stumbled closer and closer to the door until it opened.

In the doorway stood a man in boxer shorts. Kids poured out the door around him. His eyes were very squinty and his skin dark. His taupe hair spiked out in all directions.

"Do you have any idea how late it is!" he asked sharply.

"Welp, it's all yours," said Packrat, and sat down on a nearby rock.

"I… uh…" Von Stupor sputtered.

"What? What do you want? It took me an hour to get all my brothers and sisters to get in bed, and now I have to do it all over again! I certainly hope that what you say is worth the trouble!"

"Well, if it must be worth your trouble, I suppose I could say that it costs the United States approximately three cents to manufacture a single one dollar bill."

The man stared at Von Stupor for a moment, gathered the kids inside, and slammed the door.

"You didn't handle that too well," commented Packrat.

"You awoke him in the dead of night! Would you honestly believe him to accept a pokémon challenge?"

"Awww, I was only trying to help."

"Well, you may assist me tomorrow when I challenge the gym leader."

"Are you kidding? You don't have to challenge the leader. An official battle is an official battle."

"And it shall take place tomorrow! Let us go."

Von Stupor turned to walk away when he heard pounding on the gym door again. He flipped around to see Packrat banging up a storm.

"_Hey stupid, you still asleep!_" he shrieked.

Von Stupor ran to Packrat and tried to pull him away. Thumping was heard in the house. Packrat ran back to the rock and the gym door flew open, hitting Von Stupor and throwing him down to the ground on his rear.

"_What is your problem!_" shrieked the man.

Kids poured out of the house again.

"_You're not even from around here, do you make waking people up in the middle of the night some sort of hobby!_"

Von Stupor simply drummed his fingers together nervously and looked at Packrat. Packrat simply shrugged.

Von Stupor turned to the man and said while pointing at Packrat, "He did it."

"Wh…? He's a pokémon! You told him to do it!"

"He did it on his own!"

"That's a wild pokémon?"

"No, he's with me."

"So you weren't the one yelling 'hey stupid, are you still asleep'?"

"Yes, that was Packrat."

"You expect me to believe that that pokémon said that? A _talking_ pokémon?"

Von Stupor looked at Packrat.

"Rattata," he said casually.

After a moment, the man's face shriveled with anger and he yelled at the children to go back into the house. Surprised, they went into the house quietly, some sniffling.

"_I'm going to bed now,_" he told Von Stupor. "_If something pounds on my door one more time tonight, you had better hope I don't see you when I come out._"

The man stomped back into his house and slammed his door.

Von Stupor turned and looked at Packrat. He wasn't happy.

"You _really _didn't handle it well _that _time."

Von Stupor reached into Ash's bag and puled out a pokéball.

"What are you gonna do with that thing?" Packrat asked.

Von Stupor pointed the device at packrat and commanded, "Return!"

A scarlet ray shot out of the ball and engulfed Packrat, sending him inside it.

"Hey, what are you doing you son of a…" he trailed off.

"Off to the pokécenter!" crowed Von Stupor, and journeyed forth.


	4. Baron's First Battle!

"Chapter 4: Baron's First Battle!"

By: Von Stupor

Baron Von Stupor spent the rest of the night in the town's pokécenter as there was no local motel. Come daytime, he left for the Pewter City gym.

He entered via the building's front door, into the battling arena. As he did, he heard a frighteningly familiar voice echo throughout the room.

"Welcome to the Pewter City gym!" it called menacingly.

From around the corner, a man appeared. It was the same man from the previous night.

"You!" he cried, instantly recognizing Von Stupor. "Who do you think you are, showing your face around here again?"

"My… face? You can see it?" Von Stupor uttered excitedly.

"You know what I mean."

Thinking for a moment, Von Stupor then said, "Ewww! I only want a pokémon league battle, not… ugh!"

"What are you babbling about?"

"Guh, Ulyaoth forbid you should mention that again!"

"Whatever. So you really expect me to battle you after the stunt you pulled last night?"

"I speak no lies! 'Twas not me!"

"_You were standing right there!_"

"Prove it."

"Wh…! You—"

"I thought not. Battle me!"

"You know what? I can tell by your attitude you're not even a serious pokémon trainer. You're an excuse to trainers alike! Fine then, I'll battle you. I, Brock, of the Pewter City gym will not fail to the likes of you! This official battle will be one-on-one; first to lose a pokémon loses the match!"

"Yay! OKAY! I only have one pokémon, after all."

"Hmph. Better hope it's good, 'cause here we go! Geodude, I choose you!"

Brock threw his pokéball into the arena and when it hit the ground, Geodude popped out and gave a battle cry.

"Geodude!" it cried fiercely.

"I'll choose Packrat!" cried Von Stupor, and threw his respective pokéball into the arena.

It hit the ground and out popped Packrat.

"Pack, packrat?" he said upon tumbling out. He then turned to Von Stupor and began screaming. "_Packrat packrat rat rat packrat pack— _uh, I mean, what the hell is your problem!"

"Now, Geodude, Tackle attack!" ordered Brock.

"Packrat, dodge the geodude!" Von Stupor ordered, ignoring Packrat's angry screeching.

Packrat turned and saw Geodude barreling towards him. Panicked, he leapt to the side, resulting in a miss.

"Packrat, counter quickly with a Tackle attack!"

Packrat looked at Von Stupor like he was crazy.

"What the… Stupor, it's a damn rock!" he ranted. "Like a Tackle attack from my soft and fleshy body is gonna do _anything_ to hurt it! Use your head, you dunce!"

"A… a talking pokémon?" Brock asked, astounded.

"…And I'm not a freaking pokémon!"

_While Packrat stalls, I can think of what moves he can use…_ thought Von Stupor to himself. _What can he possibly do to a rock? That is it!_

"Packrat, use Provoke!" he commanded.

"Heh, something I can do!" agreed Packrat.

"Geodude, Rock Throw!" Brock ordered.

Geodude grabbed a nearby rock and hurled it at Packrat. Packrat easily stepped aside.

"Hey big, slow, and stupid, don't tell me that's the best you got!" Packrat laughed.

"Geo?" said the geodude prior to narrowing its eyes. It then angrily charged at Packrat.

"Now Packrat, use Torment!"

The geodude soared underneath Packrat as he leapt into the air. Packrat landed on top of the geodude and started drumming its head with his front paws.

"Neener, neener!" he teased. "Can't catch me, huh? Maybe if you didn't move at the speed of erosion you'd stand a chance, _ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!_"

"_Geoooooooo!_" screamed Geodude, and swung its hands up at Packrat.

Packrat jumped off behind it as it wound up slapping the top of its head.

"Wah hah!" he continued, wiping tears from his eyes. "I can't believe you fell for that! You're about dumber than a rock, you know that? _Ha ha ha, sure says a lot about you! **Waaaaaa hah hah hah hah hah hah!**_"

Geodude began crying and pounded the ground with its fists as hard as it could, beginning to grow a bright light.

"No! Geodude, _don't!_" screamed Brock.

A great explosion then erupted from Geodude. The force sent Packrat tumbling halfway across the arena. He wound up on his back and laid there, eyes closed. Geodude lay unconscious in the arena.

"Geodude self-destructed…" Brock uttered, astonished. "But at least your pokémon didn't resist the blast either, so you still didn't win. Close, but no BOULDERBADGE."

"Wouldn't count on that, Spikezilla…" mumbled Packrat as he shakily stood up. "And I'm not a pokémon, stupid…"

"What…? I can't believe it! That means…"

"Yeah, we won. Fork over the BOULDERBADGE so we can go."

"Ah, whatever. Just take the stupid thing and never come back to Pewter City again. I'm done here." Brock pouted, defeated, and tossed a BOULDERBADGE towards Packrat. He returned Geodude to its pokéball and walked away.

"We have our first badge!" cheered Von Stupor.

"No way dude, this is yours! You're the one that gave the command to tease that big pile of ugly. You earned it," said Packrat with a sincere look of approval.

"Eeee," Von Stupor uttered gleefully and clipped it to the inside of his cope. He then drew a smiley face in the dirt of the gym and left, ready to earn his next badge.


	5. Supernatural Stalker?

Chapter 5: Supernatural Stalker? 

By: Von Stupor

"…And now we venture towards the mysterious Mt. Moon! Surely it will be full of peril, as we will be encountering numerous trainers!" rambled Von Stupor. "Can we survive? Will we become lost? What exactly does it mean to 'white out'?"

"Alright, I get the idea!" Packrat snapped, cutting him off. "Where exactly does this path lead to, anyway?"

" Mt. Moon."

"Where does _Mt._ _Moon_ go, dummy!"

"Ah, 'tis the most direct route to Cerulean City! Not to mention the easiest…"

"Yeah, it's not like you'd want to climb over it or anything. Too rugged and stuff, right?"

"Indeed."

The two had finally prepared for their journey to Mt. Moon. Packrat paid a visit to the pokécenter to get rested up and Von Stupor swung by to buy some items with his winnings from battle.

"You are prepared to go?" Von Stupor asked Packrat.

"Yep!" he replied, upbeat. "I tell you, I may not be a pokémon, but those pokécenters sure know how to make you feel warm and tingly all over! Anyways, let's shove off, shall we?"

The two followed the path that led out of Pewter City. Just then, a random kid stopped them.

"You're a trainer right?" he said to them. "BROCK's looking for new challengers! Follow me!"

The kid began walking away and drug Von Stupor by his cope. Von Stupor watched Packrat flick his hand at Von Stupor and sit on a nearby rock.

Von Stupor was drug right back to the gym's entrance.

"If you've got the right stuff, go take on BROCK!" said the kid, and walked away, disappearing into thin air as he touched the fence that separated him from the road behind it.

Confused, Von Stupor blundered back to the rock to see Packrat standing off to the side, petrified with fear. He stared at the kid that just drug Von Stupor, standing in his original spot.

"Did you see him, Stupor? He just… popped right out of the ground! _Like daisies!_" sputtered Packrat incoherently.

"What?" asked Von Stupor, confused.

The kid stared straight forward.

"I saw him disappear over at that fence, and the instant he did that, he sprouted up right here!" babbled Packrat, and turned to the kid. "What the hell are you!"

The kid silently stared straight forward.

Packrat stared, and Von Stupor said, "Perhaps we should press forth…"

They began to walk away when the kid grabbed Von Stupor's cope again, spouting, "You're a trainer right? BROCK's looking for new challengers! Follow me!"

Once more, Von Stupor was dragged away, Packrat lagged behind.

He watched in horror as the kid shot out of the ground again after reaching the gym and disappearing into the fence.

"You are one creepy motherf—" started Packrat when he was interrupted by Von Stupor running past him, calling.

"_Run Packrat, while he is idle!_"

Packrat dashes after Von Stupor, blowing a raspberry at the kid.

Just then, Von Stupor feels a tug on his cope, and the kid was miraculously standing right behind him again.

"You're a trainer right?" he asked. Just then, Packrat gave him a hard slap across the side of his head, knocking him off Von Stupor and sending him sprawling to the ground.

"You've just been slapped. Nyah!" he said arrogantly.

The two began running again. They weren't far when the boy sprouted out of the ground in front of them and shot his hands out, grabbing them by their necks.

"Ack! See, Stupor? Like a damn daisy!" Packrat hacked.

Von Stupor kicked the kid in his shin. He flinched a bit, but his face remained straight. His voice became very deep and distorted.

"_No one passes by me unauthorized,_" he grumbled, and evil smile across his lips.

"Wanna bet, Tiny?" growled Packrat, and gave him a fierce scratch across his face.

He made a light, prolonged gasp as bright red light billowed out of his eyes, mouth, and wounds. Packrat wailed in pure horror while Von Stupor flailed at him, crazed.

Packrat started kicking fiercely at the kid's side, and in time, they freed themselves from the kid's grasp. Packrat landed a hard punch in the kid's face, knocking him to the ground.

" Screw Mt. Moon, we've got to get back to Pewter City and get the cops on that freak!" cried Packrat, dashing towards Pewter. Von Stupor followed close behind.

The two made it back to Pewter City and the kid did not follow. He instead stood back at his post and stared at the duo from afar.

Von Stupor and Packrat marched into a nearby police station and spoke with the officer on duty, Officer Jenny.

"What seems to be the problem?" she asked politely.

"The boy out there… he will not let us pass! And when we try to, very bad and scary things happen…" replied Von Stupor, shakily.

Jenny looked out the window and said to him, "I don't see anything out here… Well, you can pass now, he's not there."

Von Stupor looked outside and saw the boy standing there still.

"Do you not see him?" he asked, pointing at the kid. "He is right there, near that rock."

"I don't see anybody."

"Eh… maybe if you come outside you can see him."

Jenny suspiciously followed the two outside and over to the boy, who remained standing.

"See him now? He is right here."

"I don't see anything, uh…"

"Baron Von Stupor."

"…Right. Well, I'm sorry, Baron Von Stupor, but I can't help you. I see nothing here, and I personally think this is a joke. You need to know that I take this job very seriously, and I, for one, come down hard on anyone who makes light of it. This is a very important job, and I don't care if little punks like you respect authority or not. I like my job, and I'm going to keep at it. Law enforcement is my passion, and if you don't like it, then you can kiss my ass."

She turned and began walking away when Packrat spouted, "Well, can we at least have your gun? Since you won't help us beat that demonically possessed freak of nature…"

She stopped dead in her tracks and wheeled around to Von Stupor.

"What? I, uh…" he sputtered and pointed at Packrat.

She looked at Packrat and he casually said, "Rattata."

"You've got a lot of nerve, Baron Von Stupor! What thrills do you get out of playing me for a fool? Do you enjoy being a jerk to everyone around you? You know, Brock told me about you. He said you were quite a nuisance, but I never thought… just go. Just go. We don't want people like you plaguing our nice little city with your foul behavior."

She then stormed off.

Von Stupor confusedly turned around to look at the kid. The kid stared back, his face straight.

"I guess we don't have a choice," Packrat whispered to Von Stupor.

"Indeed," he whispered in agreement.

Packrat spun around and cracked his tail across the boy's head, stunning him. Using his momentum, Packrat made a dash for Mt. Moon with Von Stupor close behind.

In a flash, the boy rose up in front of them and clutched their necks again

"Damn… you…" wheezed Packrat, and slashed at the kid's face multiple times.

His skin shredded away from his nose and upper lip and a bright red light came shining through his mouth, lined with pointed teeth.

Von Stupor made some underhanded blows to the kid's stomach. The kid let out a loud demonic screech, but held tightly this time.

"_You shall not passssssss!_" he hissed at the two, squeezing harder.

Packrat began clawing at his arm feverishly, ripping away all of the flesh attached to it. No blood came out, only red light, shining from within.

Von Stupor began kicking at the kid's stomach once more, but began to succumb to the lack of oxygen.

In time, Packrat wrenched himself free and proceeded to punch the kid in the side of his head. He leaned to the side from the force of the blow, but as Packrat noticed, his feet were literally anchored into the ground, maintaining his position.

"You want some of your own medicine, buddy?" he asked, and grabbed the kid's neck with both paws.

Packrat squeezed with all his might and a sick smile crept across the kid's bobbling head as he chuckled quietly at nothing.

Eventually, Von Stupor finally fell unconscious. The kid dropped his body to the ground and turned to Packrat.

Without saying a word, Packrat socked him in his face. The kid wobbled backward, and pulled his feet out of the ground. He emitted a low growl and loosed a red aura around him. His skin and clothing vaporized away, leaving behind a charred skeleton of a corpse behind. The kid hovered in the air, growling.

"Oh dear god," uttered Packrat, keeping a determined poker face.

Von Stupor then regained consciousness and stood back up. Just then, something caught the kid's eye.

"You have a BOULDERBADGE?" he said in his normal voice, reverting back to his human appearance. "Wow, you rock! Good luck with your next badge!"

Packrat then snuck up behind the kid and gave a swift punt between his legs. The kid screamed in pain and his head exploded into burning embers.

"Wow," said Packrat, impressed. "I didn't see that one coming."

"Indeed…" agreed Von Stupor. "…Well, shall we continue forth?"

"I guess so, my good man."


	6. Foul Fowl Rumble!

**Hello, my readers! Here I am, with another installment of 'Pokémon Gray: Special Baron Von Stupor Edition'. I apologize for the delay, but this fanfiction kinda took backseat to 'Darkness Absolute', as it is being written for a fanfiction duel, and I don't want to keep my opponent waiting. However, I am so far ahead in that damn fic that while I'm posting chapter 6 (I think), I already have as far as chapter 10 typed, and will be starting chapter 11 sometime soon, I hope. Since I'm so far ahead in that, I now have plenty of time to work on this, which I have sadly neglected for some time. 'Darkness Absolute' is almost done, so fear not, soon my full attention will be on this fic again. With that out of the way, I believe I shall respond to my reviews, one by one!**

**Rice Kracker: Yeah, the alerts and my personal emails are my only way of keeping in touch with you, and even then, you still haven't sent me anything lately. Well, I know when I'm hated. Lol, kidding. Yeah, I personally don't like Ash, so I had to figure out a way to get him out of the picture and squeeze Stupor in, lol. How did those last two paragraphs look familiar? I'm curious now, lol.**

**Rice Kracker: Yeah, that old man was my attempt at spoofing the fact that the generic villagers only have one thing they'll say, but know absolutely nothing else, lol. Packrat's fun to use in battle, because his style is so undisciplined, lol. If you liked his fighting back then, you'll get a kick out of his future battles! Good stuff. I'm sorry to say that Jessie and James won't be appearing in this story, as I'm moreso ficcing the game than I am the anime. I may throw in a few anime elements, but my story isreally trying togo by the game.**

**keeper-of-the-triforce: If you were the only person to ever readthis chapterforever and ever (or anyone else, for that matter), and it made you smile, then my job is done. **

**Demon Fan: Had me cracking up at my own jokes from time to time.**

**Rowen Inc: Thanks for the suggestion, though Von Stupor's actually extremely intelligent, it's his insanity that masks it all. I mean, in order to place as high as he did in the Battle City tournament of 'The Masked Duelist', he'd have to be rather brilliant, wouldn't you agree? ;)**

**keeper-of-the-triforce: Moon rocks? Nah. Moon stones? Probably. Moon cheese? You bet! Lol, thanks for the compliment, I appreciate it.**

**Rice Kracker: Yep, let me be the first to say that Packrat can be a little bitch, lol. I read that fact on the back of a pack of oatmeal, or something like that, ha ha...**

**Rice Kracker: Hah, thanks, glad you liked the battle! Couldn't do much, given he was fighting a rock, but eh... The future battles are more intense, I promise you. As for Packrat, it's interesting to see him not acting like a jerk all the time, eh? He's not a one-dimensional character, you know. There are sides to him you've yet to see. ;) I'm surprised people think Stupor's as awesome as they do! It's really quite flattering. **

**keeper-of-the-triforce: Yeah, I horrified myself the entire time I typed that chapter. That was a great big spoof of the guy who won't let you pass until you beat Brock, blown waaaaaay out of proportion. The most interesting part about it is that The beginning of that chapter and all of this chapter were originally one chapter, and then I remembered that I wanted to spoof that guy, so I threw him in there. But then more crap started happening, and next thing I knew, he was acting all demonic and everything and it just got crazy... Yeesh. Anyways, glad you enjoyed it. It'll probably be my favorite chapter in the story. 'Tis my favorite thus far!**

**john: It was intended to be wierd, and I'm glad you liked 'The Masked Duelist'. Thanks for the compliment!**

**NightmareShadow: He did! I accredit that analogy to evanescenceyugiohfangirl, of Yamea. That saying has been held so close to my funny bone forever, lol.**

**Rice Kracker: That kid is just a spoof of the guy who won't let you pass until you beat Brock in Pokémon Red, Blue, FireRed and LeafGreen. Anyone who has played any of those four games (and beaten Brock) should completely understand and thusly be able to fully appreciate what I did there, lol. So he really poses no significance in accordance to being near a rock-themed gym. The whole freaking chapter had me chuckling to myself, going, "Oh, dear god, this is just fed up..."**

**Alright, well I guess that's all of them! Almost half of my reviews are from the same loyal reader I gained from 'The Masked Duelist', ha ha ha... I guess almost no one likes a good old-fashioned adventure anymore, lol... However, I don't care. I write this crap to amuse myself anyways, and anyone else who happens to like it just proves as an added bonus. The story shall continue, regardless of all! Introducing another poorly named chapter, which appropriately spoofs the ill-concieved episode names from the show!**

* * *

"Chapter 6: Foul Fowl Rumble!"

By: Von Stupor

The duo of Baron Von Stupor and Packrat, after their encounter with the strange boy who barred their path towards Mt. Moon, resumed their trek for the mysterious mountain.

"Mt. Moon grows near," mentioned Baron Von Stupor.

Suddenly, Packrat stopped Von Stupor and motioned toward some tall grass.

"Shhh," he shushed. "Look, a wild pokémon."

"You're right, I can see him. You go fight it, I'll fetch a pokéball."

"Well, don't you want to know what it is? Check your pokédex, the password is 45312!"

"Hm? It is password protected? How did you know it was— How did you know the password?"

"There's no time for that, just pull the stupid thing out, I wanna know what I'm fighting, _unlike last time!_"

Sighing, Von Stupor pulled out the pokédex and pointed it at the pokémon.

"Spearow," it buzzed. "The flying pokémon. It eats bugs in grassy areas and has to flap its short wings at high speed to stay airborne. Its sharp beak can split rocks and is known for its short fuse and aggressive nature."

"Hm. Now you know not to let it peck you," Von Stupor observed.

"Oh yes, I only want pokémon with warm and fuzzy beaks to peck me!"

"Those could still hurt—"

"Shut up and get the pokéball!"

Just then, the spearow began to take flight. It flapped its wings wildly and began to take flight. It flapped its wings wildly and ran along the ground.

"Oh, no you don't," muttered Packrat, picking up a rock and throwing it at the bird.

The rock cracked it in the back of its head and it fell over.

"Gotcha! You got that pokéball yet, Stupor?"

"I… don't understand… There's nothing in here!"

"Wh… that bag is upgraded! In Pokémon FireRed and LeafGreen, the bag is divided into pockets. You're looking in the Key Items pocket!"

Just then, something sharp struck Packrat in the back of his head. The force sent him stumbling to the ground. He leapt up, clutching his head and wobbled a bit from a daze. He saw an angry Spearow with a big welt on its head, hovering in the air and squawking furiously.

"You little bitch!" he grunted angrily, gritting his teeth and holding back a tear. "You're ready for round two!"

"Packrat, it doesn't make any sense! The author specifically said this fanfiction would strictly use the original 151 pokémon!" Von Stupor argued.

The spearow lunged at Packrat, who managed to catch it by its neck with one paw and slapped its head its head to and fro with his second.

"Yeah, and I just used the moves Taunt and Torment in the last frickin' chapter, which didn't first appear until Ruby and Sapphire! Trust me on this, dang it!" he spouted back at Von Stupor.

The spearow caught Packrat's paw in its beak and bit down hard. Packrat shrieked out in pain and began flailing the clinging bird back and forth.

"Perhaps you're right…" Von Stupor muttered and began searching other pockets.

Packrat frantically smacked the bird against a nearby tree.

"_Stupor, you had better hurry up with that ball!_" he screamed.

With one last smack, the bird let go of his paw and fell to the ground. It jumped up and began squawking at the sky.

"I've got one!" announced Von Stupor and pulled out a pokéball.

"Lob one over here, Stupor!" Packrat called.

Von Stupor obeyed and hurled one toward Packrat.

"Batter up!" cried Packrat, grabbing the bird by its feet. He swung it at the ball and cracked its head on it.

The ball flew away, opening up and sucking the spearow into it from out of Packrat's hands. The ball thumped to the ground and began shaking.

The duo watched it in nervousness as it continued shaking. After a few moments, the ball stopped and a light on the button blinked, signifying a successful capture.

Just then, the sky grew dark and the two heard fluttering of wings.

"Ohhhhhh, crap," whimpered Packrat to himself as he turned to see a flock of angry spearow coming in their direction.

"Perhaps we should skedaddle…" said Von Stupor, grabbing the pokéball which housed his captured Spearow.

"Yeah, perhaps we should!" Packrat cried, dashing over to Von Stupor.

"Packrat, get in a pokéball!" ordered Von Stupor, pulling out another pokéball. "At least I can guarantee your safety!"

"Wh…! It's okay, I'll be fine!"

"We're not going to outrun the spearow."

"I… I appreciate the offer, but I'm sticking with you 'till the end!"

They both stood together and faced the flock. The spearow fell into a dive, and began a combined Sky Attack.

Just then, a voice shouted, "Onix, block their attack with Protect! Hoo-hah!"

A large rock serpent quickly coiled itself around Von Stupor and Packrat. The spearow slammed into the serpent and harmlessly bounced off of it. They all dropped to the ground, unconscious.

"Good, Onix! Return! Hoo-hah!"

The snake glowed red and retracted into its pokéball.

The next thing Von Stupor and Packrat saw was a large, burly man standing near the entrance to Mt. Moon.

"Hurry and get in here before the spearow recover! Hoo-hah!" he called.

Von Stupor and Packrat scampered into the cave behind the man.

"That was a very reckless act you just did, attacking a spearow. Hoo-hah!" said the man.

"Hey!" snapped Packrat in reply. "It's not like that stupid pokédex told us that would happen!"

"Easy, easy, now. I can tell you're a rookie trainer, and everyone's entitled to their mistakes. Just be careful next time. I am Bruno, of the Elite Four. Hoo-hah!"

"I am Baron Von Stupor, and do you mean the Elite Four of the pokémon league?"

"Yes, exactly. I see that you have a talking pokémon. Those are rather rare. Hoo-hah!"

"I am _not_ a freaking pokémon!" shouted Packrat.

"Ha ha ha! I also see that you are full of energy. Hoo-hah!"

"Anyways," Von Stupor began. "I thank you greatly for the saving of our asses with the spearow. Is there any way we can repay you?" Von Stupor asked Bruno intently.

"Well, you are a pokémon trainer, no doubt. If you are or decide to take the pokémon league challenge, you will eventually have to face me. Should that happen, just promise me a spectacular battle. Hoo-hah!"

"Very, well then!"

"With that said, I must continue my training. Farewell, Baron Von Stupor, until we meet again! Hoo-hah!"

"Farewell, Bruno! Thank you again!"

Bruno disappeared into a tunnel.

Von Stupor looked at a nearby sign. It pointed in the direction of the exit to Cerulean.

"You think Bruno took the wrong tunnel for training or something?" Packrat asked Von Stupor.

"I suppose so. Anyway, we should hurry, we cannot forget our prime objective," he replied.

"Yeah, yeah, we'll get that bag to Rash, don't worry."

"His name is Ash, Packrat."

"Yeah, I know."

"…Okay, then. Moving on to other things, Cerulean is over yonder," he said, pointing in the direction of the sign's instruction.

Together, they ventured deeper into the cavern.


	7. Mt Moon Mayhem!

**Hello again, readers! You're in for a treat, for it is here that an honest-to-goodness battle shall take place as the team is introduced to... the Rockets! But first, I must respond to my reviewers!**

**keeper-of-the-triforce: Spoofing the game and not the show, and I take quite a bit of pride in it! **

**Demon Fan: Hah, glad you liked it. That is certainly one of my better scenes in all of my fanfictions.**

**john: Yeah... they probably wouldn't have lived through it.**

**Jellybob 15: The beauty of the plot is that Von Stupor is trying to return a bag to someone who got eaten by a Gyarados in the first chapter... hahaha...**

**Jellybob 15: Yeah, I've worried through the story so far that Packrat may very well be overshadowing Von Stupor, but its his character that does that, and can't be helped. All I can really do is counter-balance it, and I'm not sure how to go about it. Ah, well. Stupor will get his chance to shine in time.**

**Jellybob 15: Packrat's got a knack for it, it seems. ;**

**Jellybob 15: Haha, the whole joke is that he took it the wrong way, and because I don't remember (or just don't know) which way he took it, that makes it all the funnier. Yeah, Packrat's a bit unpredictable, quiaff? Yeah... Brock would do just that, I firmly believe.**

**Jellybob 15: Yeah, they never did think to show the badge, did they? Of course, the kid kinda didn't give them a chance, either, lol. Everybody loves Packrat, lol!**

**Jellybob 15: That part with Bruno was also a last-minute addition. I was thinking about how there wasn't much humor added with Bruno, and I also remembered that classic phrase of his... Then I exaggerated it. Severely. I'm seriously surprised that peoplegenuinely like Packrat, lol!**

**So ends this chapter's responses! To all, thanks for reading, thanks for reviewing! Hope you enjoy this next chapter! Payce! ambles away**

* * *

"Chapter 7: Mt. Moon Mayhem!"

By: Von Stupor

"What's up, Stupor? You seem more dazed than usual."

"I was just thinking about things, is all."

"You, _thinking_? Ho-ho-ho-ho!"

"Yes… if we were to have shown that boy my BOULDERBADGE, we could have avoided that entire mess."

"Well, kinda late to do anything about that now, eh, genius?"

"'Tis true, and at least we… got away with our souls intact."

"I think that fireworks show at the end was pretty well worth it, hahaha."

Von Stupor chuckled at that.

As he and Packrat traveled deeper and deeper into the cavern, they began to hear voices. They soon got closer, and Packrat became able to understand what the voices were saying.

"If my ears are correct, these voices don't sound friendly," Packrat whispered. "Let's listen from around the corner here."

"How do you know this?" Von Stupor whispered back.

"Well gee; I have big ears, so I guess that means I can hear well! Just do it! I think I heard them say something about a fossil."

The two sat around a corner and listened.

"…won't take more than a few more minutes," said one voice.

"And what of their condition?" asked another.

"Unverified at this time, but if a supernerd has them, they are beyond the shadow of a doubt in prime condition."

"Excellent. Just corner him and—"

Just then, a guard shouted in surprise from behind Baron Von Stupor and Packrat. They wheeled around to see a man dressed in a black long-sleeved shirt, pants, and boots. He also sported a black Mario-esque hat and white gloves.

The two men from around the corner ran to Von Stupor and Packrat's location. The man with the first voice was of the same attire as the guard while the man with the second voice was in a business suit.

"How dare you meddle in Team Rocket's affairs!" said the man in the suit.

"'Twas really quite easy, we just hid around this corner here, and—"

"Enough! How much have you heard? Answer me!"

"I heard from a friend that you got some real goat cheese breath, and boy was he ever right!" Packrat interjected.

"Insolence!" he blurted prior to pointing to the two guards with him. "You two, teach this boy a lesson he'll never forget!"

Upon saying this, the suited man ran away.

"But… I am no boy, I am twenty-one years of age!" argued Von Stupor in vain.

Ignoring him, the two Rocket grunts each sent out a pokémon. One released a machop while the other summoned an ekans.

"Go, Packrat and Spearow!" shouted Von Stupor, throwing the pokéball that contained Spearow towards the enemy.

"Yeah, let's go!" cried Packrat, charging into battle.

"Packrat, hold the two off with Sand-Attack! Spearow, come get this potion!" ordered Von Stupor.

Packrat violently shuffled his feet, creating a cloud of dust, blinding the opposition temporarily while Spearow obediently came to Von Stupor.

_Now I must think of a strategy,_ thought Von Stupor. _I know Machop is proficient with hand-to-hand combat, so charging with Packrat is most unwise, as Packrat's fighting style is highly undisciplined… However, with Spearow's gift of flight, I may stand a chance yet!_

"I have a plan!" announced Von Stupor. "Packrat, use Scratch on the ekans, and Spearow, use Peck on Machop!"

"It's time to double team this kid!" taunted the first grunt.

"Yeah," agreed the second. "Ekans, use Poison Sting on the rat!"

"Machop, back up Ekans with a Karate Chop!"

Ekans lunged at Packrat, but he jumped in the air and landed on top of it. He loosed a cocky laugh and scratched it from its midsection straight up to the top of its head. Due to Ekans's tough scales, this did absolutely nothing.

"Ekanssssss…" it hissed in frustration.

Machop ran from the diving Spearow, causing its attack to miss. It then leapt into the air and came down towards Packrat.

"Packrat, beware!" cried Von Stupor.

Packrat turned around just in time for Machop to slam its wrist into the side of his neck.

Packrat hit the ground hard and tumbled from the force of Machop's vicious blow. He laid there on the ground, motionless.

"No!" Von Stupor cried again.

"Great!" exclaimed the second grunt. "Now, Ekans! Ensnare his Spearow with a Wrap attack!"

In a flash, Von Stupor's spearow was ensnared and constricted by the ekans's tail. Only its head could be seen.

"Machop, finish it off with Karate Chop!" commanded the first grunt.

Machop marched over to the helpless bird and raised its hand up for a final strike. Then from out of nowhere, Packrat leapt down and launched a fist right into Machop's stunned face. Machop fell and tumbled away. Ekans looked surprised, but continued to squeeze away at Spearow.

"Scratches may not work against you, my friend, but I know what would," Packrat said coolly to the serpent.

He then poked it in its eyes hard. Ekans squinched them shut and yelped in pain. Taking advantage of this, Packrat shoved a large rock in its mouth. Then, using the rock as a lever, he swung Ekans's head down, slamming it into the ground. The blow stunned Ekans enough that it loosened its grip on Spearow. After a brief struggle, the bird wrenched itself free of the snake's grip.

"What the!" exclaimed the second grunt. "That thing used Mega Punch and Pound without being told to! How is that possible!"

"I don't like the looks of this… let's get out of here!" cried the first.

The two called back their pokémon and ran away.

"Hey… we gonna keep going?" huffed Packrat.

"Indeed! We will have some peril ahead of us, and with the spearow waiting in the opposite direction, we have nowhere else to go but forward."


	8. Chapter A: Inconspicuous Inscription!

**Here's the next chapter to the story! Here's where things get interesting, as something very tragic has happened to me. Eh, just read on, you'll find out. Before that, however, my responses.**

**John: Not much effort in weighing your options there, eh? lol**

**EkaSwede: Glad to see you liked it! Tell me though... why would Packrat express the willingness to kiss someone's ass? shudders**

**Rice Kracker: That Packrat's always got another side to him nobody's seen, eh? That is one trait about him I'm proud of. Actually, not to toot my own horn, but I'm very pleased with and proud of Packrat's charater in general, and believe me, you guys haven't seen it all. Packrat's fighting is so undisciplined, and that in itself makes his battles funny, lol. I always fear turning the battle boring by switching him out, lol! Actually, Jessie and James were in 'Pokémon Yellow: Special Pikachu Edition', but only because the game was supposed to follow the anime somewhat, with Jessie, James and meowth, and the fact that your pikachu you get in the beginning follows you around, etc. However, I also don't include them because they seem more like comic relief characters than anything else, and their personalities cause them to do a very bad job of it (in my humble opinion, of course). Except for Meowth, Meowth is cool. The only time I genuinely laughed at Team Rocket was when Jessie got hit in the face with a pokéball in Pokémon Tower (Lavender Town) and when they brought back the magikarp salesman with James. Bah, those weren't spoilers, I never spoil my stories. They were teasers, is what they were. ;) ...And of course I still wanted to keep in touch with you! I like to keep in touch with all my friends! Reading the boring crap you send me is never a waste of my time! LOL, j/k. Don't worry, I love chatting with friends, whether what they're saying is interesting or not. It is the company that counts, after all!**

**Rice Kracker: I think bringing up past events in stories not only provides continuity, but also gives better insight towards the respective character's point of view on the matter, lol. Team Rocket is indeed in the game, so Team Rocket is indeed in the story. When Packrat fights, I really gotta think of ways he would beat his opponents without becoming a Raticate that knows Water gun, if you catch my drift. Packrat has no real special abilities, except speed, which is obvious, given his size and nature. All he can use is the environments around him and some really off-the-wall tactics,so with that being his only way, would that still render him an honorable contender? ponders Anyways, glad you enjoyed my 'making up' for omitting Jessie and James!**

**To all, thanks for reviewing, thanks for reading! I hope you're at least mildly entertained by this next chapter. It's all I've got for now, and for some time to come...**

"Chapter 8: Inconspicuous Inscription!"

By: Von Stupor

"Gah, this cave's rather long, you think?" Packrat asked Von Stupor.

"'Tis taking longer than usual to travese, indeed..." Von Stupor replied to the rat.

Just then, the duo heard a call from behind them. They turned to see a man about the same build as Von Stupor walk up to them. He wore a dull gray colored T-shirt and dark blue jeans that hung over his white sneakers just a bit. He had dirty-blonde colored hair, parted in the middle.

"Greetings, friend! You are traversing the cave, too?" asked Von Stupor nicely.

"Well really, it's only to find you two. There's a problem going on right now."

"Hey wait a minute, do you even know who we are?" asked Packrat, a bit confused.

"Kinda yes, kinda no. You can call me Baron Von Stupor, I'm the author of the fanfiction here."

The two stared at the man nervously. He looked at Von Stupor for a moment and slapped his forehead.

"That's right..." he said to himself. "Just call me Dennis."

"Yeah, okay. You mind telling us what the problem is?" asked Packrat, getting a bit irritated.

"Well, the thing is, my laptop finally took a complete crap on me, and--"

"Wait a minute, you're the author of the story? Prove it."

Sighing, he pointed to Packrat and said, "You care about your friends more than you put out and you're technically not supposed to have anything to do with Von Stupor according to you two's respective storylines." He then pointed at Von Stupor. "Your name is not really Baron Von Stupor, even though you fight tooth and nail that it is. Also, I based your physical appearance off of mine. Good enough?"

"My name really is Baron Von Stupor!" argued the masked man defiantly.

"Hey..." said Packrat, a finger to his chin. "If you based his physical appearance off of yours, does that mean his face looks like yours?"

"No it doesn't, now stop wasting time! We have to fix this issue. I went to turn on my laptop today, and it was having some issues. First was beeping I heard coming from it, which was minor. Now, however, whenever I plug in the AC adapter, the laptop itself spits out sparks. That means the whole damn thing is completely useless, and the only way to access the data on my hard drive is to pull it out (cause it's removable), and then put it in another compatible laptop. There's two ways I can do this, I could either borrow someone else's and hope to god it'll accept my hard drive, or buy a new one and stick the hard drive in that one. I don't personally know anyone with a laptop, so that leaves only one solution."

"You must buy a new one..." said Von Stupor.

"So what? What does that have to do with us?" asked Packrat.

"All of my typed fanfictions are on that laptop and nothing else because I didn't have enough time to make backup copies of everything. That means, until I get another laptop for which I can transfer my data, I can't update any of my fanfictions, unless I want to type the whole thing over again, which I have absolutely no intention of doing, mind you. Waste of time, it is."

"So we're supposed to help you, I guess?"

"Well I would hope so if you want the story to progress."

"Hmmm... you use PayPal, right?"

"Yeah, why?"

Packrat turned to the computer screen and pointed his finger at you, saying, "Hey! He uses PayPal! Why not send him a donation--"

Dennis then clamped his mouth swiftly.

"I'm _not_ going to ask for PayPal donations! Not only do I think I can get in trouble with that on Fanfiction, but I don't want to accept generosities from people, especially for something as stupid as this!"

"What else can you do?" asked Von Stupor intently.

"I managed to land a job at a local retail store, I refer to it as the Red Empire. I'm just going to have to make money from that, but before then, I have to pay off what I owe other people, too. Overall, it could take about one, maybe one and a half months to save up the money for the laptop alone, but to pay off what I owe my parents first (which I am definitely doing first)... god, I don't know..."

The three sat in silence for a moment.

"We could... come with you to help you out, if you want..." offered Von Stupor.

"Stupor! We're already srcewing over our vacation by going on this stupid adventure, what makes you think we'll get _it_ done if we do this side quest, too! This will take months!"

"Well, since the story's technically not progressing as long as my laptop's defunct, time's pretty much frozen here and in all of my other fics..." Dennis reasoned.

"...Oh. Well, that's true. Eh, why not? Stupor's gonna do it anyway."

"Baron Von Stupor, you have a telepipe on you?"

"That I do!"

"Good. Let me use it, that will return us to my city, and when we step back into it, it will bring us right back here."

"Very well!"

"How the hell did you get a telepipe, Stupor?" Packrat suddenly interrogated.

"As long as the entire cosmos of this fanfiction is being interrupted, what does it matter?"

"But it's from a video game--"

"All right, here goes!" announced Dennis, cutting them both off.

Dennis activated the telepipe and it burst into a bright tube of light. The light shone as it waited for the travelers to step into it.

"This thing can only be used by me since I used it, so there's no cheating possible," he informed the two.

"I already knew," mentioned Von Stupor.

"I was mainly saying it to Packrat."

"Hey!" he shot at Dennis.

The three then teleported off to Dennis's world.

**As much as I want to say this is a joke, this situation has seriously happened. With the exception of Packrat and Baron Von Stupor journeying with me, my laptop has finally ceased to work at all, and I have no way to update, and won't until I pay off the money I owe my parents and my grandmother, and save enough money to purchase a new laptop that I can transfer the data from my old laptop's hard drive to. This process will take some time, so I'll further the filler material here as a means of keeping all updated on my progress while giving you all some sort of entertainment to go with. I apologize dearly for the delay, and I'll work hard to get this fic's main plot up and running as soon as possible.**


	9. Chapter B: Beginning with Bad Luck!

**Greetings, everybody! I'm still working on getting access to my laptop data, but no definite plan as of yet. Well, I think this chapter will more than explain it for you. First, some responses!**

**EkaSwede: Yeah... just freaking figures it'd happen to me after my plague of misfortunate, eh? Well, the thing was essentially a piece of crap, anyway, I think it was moreso crapulence than any outside forces this time.**

**john: Yeah... got a big break with the money I owe. More details below.**

**On with the story!**

"Chapter A: Beginning with Bad Luck!"

After much persuasion, Dennis was able to convince his grandmother, Kay, to allow Von Stupor, Packrat, and Dolimus to stay in her house until Dennis was able to recover his fanfictions. While Dennis slept downstairs in his room, Dolimus stayed in the adjacent guest room, linked by a large rec room while Von Stupor and Packrat slept in the upstairs guest room, adjacent to Kay. After a week, the four all met downstairs in the rec room to discuss their current game plans and progress.

"...You guys have nothing?" said Dennis forlornly.

"I can hardly go anywhere where they will allow my mask to stay on... 'Tis impossible to do anything!" whined Von Stupor.

"You could always just take the mask off, it's not attached to your face."

"'Tis not? The curse is lifted?"

"Gah..." mumbled Dennis, slapping his forehead. "I forgot, you're not Von Stupor from 'The Masked Duelist', you're Von Stupor from 'Pokémon Gray'... I never went into detail on your mask yet. Not sure if it'll be attached or not..."

Von Stupor simply stared.

After a moment Dolimus spoke up.

"...I'm trying to find a job somewhere that doesn't involve a lot of sunlight, since I'll get very sick from it."

"Very sick?" Packrat repeated. "What, are you photosensitive or something?"

"You could say that. Anyway, it's not easy getting a job when you don't have a proof of identity or eligibility to work in the United States. This place seems so demanding, and yet it has to be this way?"

"So it seems," agreed Dennis. "Well, for you guys, employment is pretty much impossible, then. What about odd jobs, anyone?"

"Odd jobs? You expect me to do favors for someone I don't even know?" Packrat argued.

"It's the only way you're gonna make any money. Plus, with your current look, you'd be lucky to be pass off as a guy in a suit."

"Well, for your information, I happen to have joined a video game tournament held nearby. When I'm done winning that prize money, I'm going to leave you guys in the dust!"

"Don't count on it. My parents felt bad about the fact that they didn't have any money to do anything for my birthday, so they decided to forgive the back rent I owe them. Not to mention I just got a check from my old telemarketing job, which will pay off most of the cell phone bill I still owe my gramma."

"Impressive, and with your new job..." stated Dolimus.

"...You will be able to attain your new laptop rather quickly, it seems." Von Stupor finished for him.

"Well yeah, but my gramma also kind of surprised me with that brand new desktop computer, which renders my need for a new laptop null practically..." Dennis mentioned.

"I see, and you don't want to spend more money on something you only want to use once." inferred Dolimus.

"Exactly."

"Well, what if you simply rented one?"

"Already checked on it, I'd have to enter a two-year contract at around fourteen dollars a week. By the time I pay it off, I'd be paying more then double what I could get it for if I got it from Best Buy."

"Perhaps you could buy one, use it, and return it when you're done for a refund?"

"Maybe, maybe..." Dennis considered, stroking his chin. "Heh, you know guys, if you bet about thirty, you can have a good night at bingo where I work at. Never know, you might win something, eh?"

"'Tis true!" Von Stupor gasped.

"Don't make a habit of it though, right?"

"Come on, we're all responsible, mature beings here," joked Dolimus. He then smirked at Packrat, saying, "Well... at least Von Stupor, you, and I are, by my observations."

"Hey, I don't think you wanna take that any further," retaliated the rat, giving Dolimus a stink eye.

"Aw... come on, you'd benefit more by not taking everything so seriously."

Packrat simply looked away, a befuddled look on his face.

Dennis chuckled lightly and changed the subject. "Alright, so what are you guys' plans so far for raising money to gain access to my laptop's hard drive?"

"Why are we raising money to access your laptop's hard drive?" asked Von Stupor.

"Well, if there's no way I can access it myself, then I'll have to rely on data recovery specialists, and they can be kind of pricey. Either way, I'm going to do what it takes to recover all of my hard work."

"I see... well, I fear 'tis odd jobs for me. If no one shall hire me with my mask on, then I'll have to resort to other methods."

"I got that video game tournament coming up," voiced Packrat.

"When will that be?" Dennis asked out of curiosity.

"Oh, another week and a half, maybe."

Dolimus then announced, "I can't be hired because I can't legally prove my identity here, so it appears I'm doing odd jobs as well. However, I'll also attempt this bingo function you mentioned. There's no harm in wagering a small sum of my earnings."

"Excellent. I have my current job, so I'll be making some good pay off of that. I'll have my cell phone bill finally paid off on or around October fourteenth, that's when I'll get my first check. Since I already have a payment down on it anyways, I should have some money left over."

"You should factor in your rent," Dolimus reminded him. "When is your grandmother going to start charging you to live here?"

"Ahhhhh, I don't know. I'll ask her eventually. If she starts soon, it may be another two weeks before my money really starts working toward it, since I get paid every other Friday. This coming Friday I won't get paid since I just arrived, or I'll have a small check, which would still be good. So, I guess that covers everything? I have my job, Packrat has a tournament, and you guys have odd jobs?"

All agreed to his statement.

"Alright then! Meeting adjourned, I guess."

"Sooo, what now?" asked Packrat.

"Nothing left to do than hang out for now, I suppose."

OIOIOIOIOIOIOIOIO

The following week, Dolimus, Von Stupor and Packrat sat together in Dennis's room.

"I have no luck with odd jobs," mentioned Von Stupor. "Though I did manage to collect some donations from people on the street with my sign."

"You mean your sign that says 'Help My Friend Get A New Laptop to Complete My Story'?" asked Dolimus, a concerned look on his face.

"Indeed!"

"You mean people actually donated to that?" asked Packrat over his shoulder as he pounded away on his GameCube controller.

"No, it's just thirty-five cents I found on the ground whilst I walked back here. 'Tis better than nothing!"

"To an extent, anyway," Dolimus said, looking serious. "You know, I recall Dennis telling me about a friend of his helping with the carts at his job, with the manager paying him under the table. I believe I may be able to try that."

"Not a bad idea," Packrat complimented. "My tournament's up soon. You guys will get to see me kick some keester, eh?"

"I shall come. I have no obligatory commitments, unfortunately," agreed Von Stupor.

"I'll only be doing the night shift, and most likely only when Dennis is working, so I should be able to make it."

"He only works mornings, you silly man!"

"He closed last Sunday and he closes this Sunday, friend. Remember?"

"Ah, touché."

Just then, Dennis walked into the room.

"Hm?" he said, glancing at Packrat on the game.

"I took the liberty of hooking up your systems to this router for you," explained the rat. "Not out of niceness, of course, but because I wanted to play. I even got your cords all nice and bundled up, neat and organized."

"Wow... thanks, Packrat!"

"Yeah, don't mention it."

"So Dolimus, I heard you mentioning a night shift?"

"Yes, remember the friend you menitoned that helped out somewhere pushing carts and was paid under the table?"

"Oh, you mean Tony. Yep, I remember."

"Do you think I could do that when you close?"

"Ehhhh, maybe... let me see what I can do. Great idea, though!"

"Packrat, your tournament is..."

"Thursday after next," answered Packrat. "October 13."

"Alright, then, I'm actually off that day, so I can come with you."

"Awesome! Everyone can come and see me whip up on everyone there!"

"Uh... Just don't get your feelings hurt, dude. These guys are competitive, and do anything to win. I would know..."

"Pah! I'll teach them to be cheap with me! Watch me stomp them all!"

OIOIOIOIOIOIOIOIO

That night, Dennis and Dolimus sat upstairs watching a movie while Von Stupor observed Packrat training on Super Smash Bros. Melee.

"You're not in the least bit nervous, eh?" Von Stupor asked him.

"Why should I be?" he asked in reply.

"Well, you've been playing for four hours now, only doing one-on-one matches against the CPU, ever-refusing to change the rules for diversity."

"If I can't annihilate these guys, I won't be able to annihilate my opponents at the tournament either. This is how it has to be! No pain no gain, eh?"

"True... but as Leonard Nimoy once said in Seaman, if would didn't know better, one might assume you're quite obsessed, or that you have nothing better to do."

"Well if one didn't know better, one might assume you're quite dense, or that you have nothing more intelligent to say."

"That one... wasn't as good as some others--"

"I know, I was just throwing it back at you, leave me alone."

After sitting for a moment to process Packrat's request, he left the room and journeyed upstairs, into the kitchen.

"What are you watching?" he called in to them.

"'Terminator 2'," Dennis called back.

"Ah. Are they at the part where the mayor drinks the water full of tadpoles?"

After a brief moment, Dolimus spat out, "What?"

"Uh... I could have been thinking of a different movie."

Von Stupor popped some leftover spaghetti into the microwave and started it up. After a while, the two began to hear strange, erratic grunting coming from the kitchen.

"What are you doing in there?" asked Dennis casually.

"Waiting for the food to finish," the baron answered in between grunts.

Within a half of a minute, Kay came out to inspect everything to see Baron Von Stupor wiggling in circles in front of the microwave while grunting. She gave him a confused look and blurted out, "What the hell... are you doing?"

"I'm waiting for the food to finish," Von Stupor replied.

"You think dancing is gonna make it move faster?"

"It always does."

"Well, could you at least do it a bit quieter? I'm trying to hear my show."

"Ah. I shall rectify the problem!"

On her way past Dennis, she leaned down and mumbled into his ear, "Your Baron Von Stupor is... really weird!"

They both chuckled lightly and she went back to her room, calling back, "Don't forget to check all the doors, make sure they're locked before you go downstairs."

Dennis acknowledged and went back to watching the movie. He could still hear Von Stupor dancing quietly in the kitchen.


	10. Chapter C: Tournament Trouncing!

**Sorry for taking so long. Here's some more development for you guys. I'm working as best as I can, and something has happened since this whole thing happened, so expect another update soon! Here are my reviewer responses, for now.**

**Thunderstorm101: You know what? I was just about to make backup copies of all my stuff too, just because my laptop _was_ unreliable. scowl**

**Amazoness Archer: Thanks for the subtle compliment. Well, I had to find a way to keep the readers updated on the progress of my bad luck recovery. TT Stupid misfortune...**

**john: ...Explain what?**

**And now, the 'story'!**

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"Chapter B: Tournament Trouncing!"

By: Von Stupor

The day of the tournament had finally arrived. Being unofficial, the hosts never demanded any real proof of identity, so Packrat was able to enter without much delay. Due to the streaming sunlight coming through the windows, Dolimus had elected to stay behind after all.

"Hmmm..." he observed. "These people are pretty good."

"I'm telling you guy, they're not going to be a pushover," Dennis responded.

"I can't wait to face them!"

Von Stupor observed nearby players, apart from the group.

After roughly an hour, the tournament started. Packrat was placed in the third match.

"I certainly hope Packrat wins," mentioned Von Stupor to Dennis. "After Dolimus was unable to attend bingo for failure to show an ID, and I still have no odd jobs..."

"Don't feel bad, not many people trust someone who always wears a mask," Dennis replied with a smirk. "But I'm seriously pessimistic about this tournament."

Packrat stepped forward and prepared to face his opponent, a member of an elite group of 'Super Smash Bros. Melee' players. The match was to be set on Final Destination, with five lives and no items.

"Gah... Packrat's against the best of the best in the first match of the tournament..." groaned Dennis, covering his face.

The match started, and Packrat chose Sheik for his character. His opponent chose Falco.

Sheik waited for Falco to make the first move. Falco oddly enough began to hover across the arena, simply by crouching and standing up repeatedly.

"What the hell! What are you doing!" cried Packrat in shock. He had never seen anything like that before. His opponent remained quiet.

Sheik moved in for an attack and dodged behind Falco. Falco was ready and performed the Falco Split, knocking Sheik off balance. He was unable to recover before he hit the ground, and Falco hovered backward, scooping him back into the air with a Bird Sweep attack. He then hopped into the air and struck Sheilk with the reflector shield. Using his double jump, he hopped above the flailing Sheik and stomped him back down with a devastating Air Drill. As Sheik bounced from the impact of hitting the ground, Falco dropped back down quickly and knocked him back into the air with the Reflector. He continued this two move combo and by the time Sheik freed himself, he was nearly at 200 damage.

Panicking, Sheik retreated. Packrat was dumbfounded at what had just transpired.

Falco began to aggresively pursue Sheik. Within moments, a sneaky Roundhouse Kick slammed him out of the arena and KO'ed him.

Dennis watched forlornly as Baron Von Stupor was astonished.

This vicious cycle continued until Packrat's lives were completely depleted, costing him the match. He nearly dropped his controller in pure and utter shock.

He sullenly shook his opponent's hand and walked over to and past Dennis and Baron Von Stupor, an irritated expression on his face.

Dennis and Von Stupor looked at each other for a moment and walked out of the building in his pursuit.

OIOIOIOIOIOIOIOIO

"They crushed me!" ranted Packrat. "I might not mind it so much if they weren't so damn cheap!"

"I told you they were really good, Packrat..." Dennis reminded him.

"I didn't know they were _that_ good!"

"So essentially, we're back where we started," commented Dolimus.

They all sat in the rec room, at the back table, stumped.

Shrugging, Dennis said, "Guys, I'm at a loss. My work wouldn't let Dolimus help, Von Stupor can't get any odd jobs, Packrat didn't win the tournament, and I'm still paying crap off and my last pay stub had some sucky hours on it. I honestly have no clue how to speed this up."

Everyone sat and thought to themselves.

"This isn't as easy as I thought it would be," Dolimus muttered unser his breath.

"Tell me about it..." Packrat agreed. "Dennis, your real world sucks."

Dennis simply sighed.

"I guess we must simply wait things out? See what develops?" suggested Von Stupor.

"Yeah, let's take a break from trying and see what happens, maybe something will fall into our lap," Dennis concurred. "It's the only thing we _haven't_ done."


	11. ChapterD:Something Lucky This Way Comes!

**Here is the latest news on my situation, along with your review responses!**

**John- This is all fluff. Nothing to do with the story, lol. The next update may be sooner than you think; read the following chapter to see what I mean. ;)**

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"Chapter C: Something Lucky This Way Comes!"

By: Von Stupor

It had been two weeks since the tournament with no change in the situation of the laptop's malfunction. Dolimus, Von Stupor, and Packrat sat downstairs in the rec room, playing a round of the Donkey Kong board game.

"So what if we never get the laptop data back?" Packrat asked the other two as Von Stupor rolled the dice.

"I recall him saying he doesn't know if he'll retype everything or not. But then, will our stories be frozen forever?" Dolimus answered.

"Well, I sure hope not. I certainly don't want to stay _here_ for who knows how long, not when I've got a life of my own back in my fanfiction."

"Well," mentioned Von Stupor. "If he does send us back, wouldn't we be frozen in the fanfictions as well? I mean, the story cannot progress without that data..."

"It would pretty much be armageddon for us, our worlds would pretty much end," said Dolimus.

Just then, the door opened, and Dennis was heard shuffling around quickly. Within a couple minutes, he bound down the stairs.

"_Guys, we're in freaking luck!_" he happily bellowed. "Target is more of a blessing to me than I ever dreamed!"

"What has occurred?" asked Von Stupor, interested.

"There's this guy at my work, Sean, I used to know him from high school. He's got a laptop, and when he's free from his busy schedule, he said he'd stick my laptop into it to recover my stories!"

Everyone's faces brightened as they stood up, huddling toward Dennis.

"There's a catch though," he said, suddenly serious. "Now, I don't think it did... but there's a chance that my hard drive got corrupted thanks to the craptop, with the sparks and all. If it's not corrupted, the files are safe, and I'll have them all to myself. If it _is_ corrupted..."

"Our worlds will end," Von Stupor finished for him.

"Don't put it that way... But yes, it all comes down to this. I'm so sure the files are okay, but there's still a chance. Now, Sean said he can't help me at all this week, but hopefully, next week will bring us a nice simultaneous break that we can capitalize on getting those files."

"So this is it, the final gamble," said Packrat. "Who'd have thought that getting into Target would help you so much in the long run?"

"Wow... it's almost like the forces of nature are making up for all the crap I went through back then, ha ha."

"They sure are, first a better job, then better pay, now your files are being recovered..." Von Stupor acknowledged.

"Don't forget Keep!" interjected Packrat smugly.

"Hey, watch it," Dennis said, fighting a smirk.

"Nyah, someone's touchy about it. People usually are when they first fall in--"

"Okay look, that's not the purpose of this chapter," said Dennis loudly, cutting Packrat off, a slight laugh following. "It's ending right now!"

"_Dennis and Ke_


	12. Chapter E: Sean's Suspenseful Standup!

**Here is the rest of the fluff, in the following four chapters. My laptop recovery has officially been successful, and in celebration of this wondrous event, I am posting TWO new chapters (in the normal storyline, of course) instead of just one, and I shall do all in my power to post a new chapter once a week on both stories! Unfortunately, review response has been officially deemed a sin on the site, though the alternative they gave us, I respect, so there are no complaints here! However John, because you must be a registered user, we cannot continue our conversation here. However, feel free to contact me through email, if you like! with all of that out of the way, I present to you the story!**

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"Chapter D: Sean's Suspenseful Standup!"

By: Von Stupor

Dennis bound in the door after a long day of work to see Von Stupor and Packrat in the upstairs living room watching television.

"These TV shows aren't short enough!" ranted Packrat. "They're taking forever to go off and get the time to 7:00!"

"Today wasn't any slower at work, either!" Dennis agreed.

"'Tis only a matter of time before we finally go back from whence we came!" Von Stupor added.

"So, what should we do to pass the time?" Dennis asked.

"I'm too excited to do anything, we should just wait!" suggested Packrat.

And so the three sat, watching television. Shows came and went, and yet their attention was hardly spent on them, rather the upcoming arrival of Sean, the one who would finally recover Dennis's laptop data, thusly allowing him to finally resume posting his typed fanfiction. In time, 7:00 arrived, and so their pee-pee dancing had commenced. They eagerly sat and took turns peeking out the window. Dolimus would occasionally call up to request the status of Sean's arrival. Before long, a half hour passed, and the three had since stopped looking out the window.

"I think I'll sleep to help pass the time," Dennis thought, and laid his head down on the couch.

Suddenly, he woke up to hear his grandmother saying, "I don't think your friend is coming tonight."

The clock said 8:30. Packrat and Von Stupor were nowhere to be seen.

"Yeah, I guess so," replied Dennis, and went downstairs for the night.

OIOIOIOIOIOIOIOIO

The next day after work, Dennis had recieved an email from Sean.

""I'm really sorry, I got swarmed with homework,'" Dennis quoted the message to his guests in the basement. "He really had a lot of stuff to do, and couldn't show up. I probably ought to give him my contact info, ha ha."

"So that means we're not going back?" asked Packrat irritably.

"It means we can't _try_ to get you back _yet_."

"When will he try again?" Dolimus wondered.

"Who knows? But I'll wait as long as it takes."


	13. Chapter F: An Amazing Alternative!

"Chapter E: An Amazing Alternative!"

By: Von Stupor

After work, Dennis came home and after a brief visit with his grandmother, sank back into the bowels of the house, Stuporia. He found there Dolimus and Packrat engaging in a game of Risk. Von Stupor merely spectated.

"I was the whipping boy!" he said to Dennis, proud.

"I've got some sort of bad news, everybody," Dennis mentioned, ignoring Von Stupor.

The two opponents paused their game to pay attention.

"Sean told me he thinks his laptop is going on him. He's having some issues with the motherboard and may have to call the company back out here to fix it. He did mention that after some fighting with it, he charged it up to last one more time, so we've gotta make this count. He said he's free this Wednesday, so what a coincidence. So am I! This thing will end on Wednesday."

Packrat gave a determined smile while Dolimus merely nodded his head.

OIOIOIOIOIOIOIOIO

As Tuesday rolled around, Dennis came home rather excited.

"Hey guys, guess what!" he asked them all downstairs. "I ran into my old youth group leader and a guy I know from the group today! The guy told me about a device called an exterior containment unit that can use a laptop hard drive like my regular old jump drive!"

"You're kidding me, and we waited all this time for _that?_ Let's go get one!" Packrat insisted.

"I'm going to, tonight! Who's coming with?"

"Isn't it obvious? We'll all come along," said Dolimus, smiling.

"Right, then! Let's go!"

"How're we all going to fit on your scooter?" Packrat asked.

"...Local bus service it is! Everybody grab a dollar from my change jar!"

OIOIOIOIOIOIOIOIO

As they all arrived at the local electronics store, Von Stupor pointed out the computer section.

"Well, I'm going straight for that exterior containment unit," commented Dennis, heading towards the computers. Everyone followed behind.

After browsing a bit, he managed to find one that rang up at forty dollars, half the advertised price.

"Today is a good day..." he said towards Dolimus and the cashier. "'Tis a good day indeed. Let's head home!"

OIOIOIOIOIOIOIOIO

As Dennis frantically ripped open the box for the drive, Dolimus carefully unfastened the laptop hard drive from its plastic container. Dennis stuck it inside the box and screwed it shut, followed by plugging it into his computer.

It was automatically detected by the computer, and did not need any software installed. As he pulled it up, there his files appeared!

"_Yes!_" Packrat shrilled in excitement.

"All right!" rooted Dennis. "Let's open them up to make sure they're not corrupted!"

Dennis attempted to access his username from the laptop and access was denied. he stared at the screen, confused. After a moment, something clicked.

He turned to everyone and said, "Mine own paranoia and distrust of the members of my family caused me to put lots of security on my computer. I ensured that only one who logs onto Windows XP under my username can access my files, and that is done by inputting a password at the startup screen. By browsing through Windows, I can't get to the startup screen and thusly cannot enter a password. Also, since this is a laptop hard drive, I can't replace my desktop's hard drive with this one so as to boot from it."

"Can you boot from the jump drive?" Dolimus asked.

"...That I do not know."

Dennis restarted his computer and routed the boot sequence to his USB port, but in vain.

Sighing, he said, "There's nothing we can do tonight. We'll just have to hope for the best tomorrow."


	14. Chapter G: Radical R's Radical Rescue!

"Chapter F: Radical R's Radical Rescue!"

By: Von Stupor

"Get up!" Packrat commanded, slapping Dennis in his face while he was sleeping.

Dennis snapped awake and gave him a stink eye.

"Sean will be here anytime, so come on!" he commanded, indifferently.

He arose from bed and blundered upstairs. On the way, he noticed Dolimus sitting in the rec room.

"Why aren't you ever upstairs often?" he asked him.

"There's a lot of sunlight up there," he said.

"Oh, that's right. Okay then!"

He continued upstairs and sat in the living room, and within a half hour, Sean pulled up into the driveway while Dennis let the dogs out front.

After some greetings, he brought Sean inside. There he met Kay, Von Stupor and Packrat.

"You mean you seriously brought them--" he started, when Dennis cut him off.

"Don't bother asking, let's just keep going," he said, chuckling.

They all journeyed downstairs with the exception of Kay and headed into Dennis's room. Dolimus joined them.

"Alright, here we go!" said Dennis, extracting his hard drive from the exterior containment unit and handing it to Sean.

He popped it into his laptop and attempted to fire it up. Unfortunately, his laptop didn't detect the hard drive.

"Well, I guess it's time for my backup," he commented.

"Ah, you came prepared?" Dennis asked.

"Yep, I have Linux installed on my machine, so we can try it using that."

"Hmmm... since the files have password restrictions in Windows, would Linux detect them?"

"Nope, Linux bypasses all Windows password restrictions."

"Jawsome!"

He tried opening Linux, but it still didn't detect the hard drive.

"Bad things are not supposed to happen when we're this close. Why are they happening?" Packrat asked Dolimus impatiently.

"Just wait, we don't know it will work or not yet," Dolimus hushed.

"Looks like it's time for my backup backup," Sean decided, reaching into his bag.

"Backup backup?"

"Yep, I have another version of Linux, called Kinoppix, on CD."

"Perhaps if you loaded up your hard drive and used mine with the exterior containment unit?" Dennis asked.

Just then, Sean stopped.

"Wait... how did the hard drive go in?" he asked, flipping it up and down. "I feel so stupid, I might have put it in there upside-down... Well, if we try it this way..."

He stuck it in one way without Linux and the computer wouldn't recognize it. He tried the inverse and Linux still wouldn't recognize it. After thinking for a moment, he realized something.

"Look at the pins on my hard drive! Does yours have any jumpers on it?" he asked.

Dennis's search returned nothing.

"That's the problem, then."

Sean plucked the jumper off of his, which served as an extender for the pins and placed it on Dennis's hard drive. Loading it into his computer, it was finally recognized and accessible.

"This is it!" Von Stupor whooped. "We shall be home in no time!"

Then all of a sudden, Kinoppix wouldn't write the files to the jump drive due to permission restrictions.

"So you can access the hard drive, it just won't let you put them on the jump drive?" Dolimus asked him.

"Yes, but I don't know why it won't let me change the settings when I'm the root user! Or wait... am I? Hmmm..."

He hopped into the shell and tried to change the computer's root settings to that of the hard drive, but to no avail.

"Well," he said. "Does your computer have two CD drives on it?"

"Nope, just one."

"Damn, I thought so... I'd burn them to CD, but I have to keep my CD in the drive, since it's running off the CD."

"I have a computer with two drives at my _parents'_ house..."

"Yeah, but we're here and not at your parents' house..."

"Yeah... well, wait! Why don't I try loading Kinoppix on my machine and then copying them straight to my hard drive by using my laptop hard drive as a jump drive with the exterior containment unit?"

"That could work, let's try that."

After hooking up the necessary components, Dennis fired up Kinoppix to see it found both hard drives just fine. However, due to more unchangable permission restrictions, he couldn't copy it to his hard drive.

"I'm... stumped..." said Dennis, confused.

"Well, why not try loading Linux from his hard drive, then using the laptop hard drive hard drive as a jump drive, and since Linux can bypass the password restrictions, try loading it all to his hard drive and burn it to CD?" suggested Von Stupor.

"That will probably work, let's try it!" agreed Sean as he removed the jumper extender from the laptop hard drive prior to Dennis installing it back into the exterior containment unit.

Everything was then found perfectly fine and Sean began burning it all to CD.

"This is it..." Von Stupor said. "We are finally going home..."

"This is just what we've been waiting for..." Dolimus added. "Well Dennis, we're sorry we couldn't help... at all, ha ha."

"It's okay, really. I enjoyed just having you guys there with me." Dennis replied, smiling. "Let's all enjoy Thanksgiving dinner tomorrow, as celebration, and then I'll take you all back home."


	15. Chapter H: A Farewell to Friends!

"Chapter G: A Farewell to Friends!"

By: Von Stupor

After a hefty meal, everyone excepting Dolimus, who did not eat, was completely full. Sean thanked Dennis and his family for inviting him over and took his leave. Soon after that, Dennis walked Baron Von Stupor, Packrat, and Dolimus out back, towards the cobblestoned recession in the side yard, behind the wooden gate.

"I can't go with you," he informed them all. "because the telepipe only goes one way."

"Right, then," Von Stupor acknowledged. "I guess this is farewell, then."

"Well, yeah... I mean, you guys may still see me and all, but it's best you stick to your stories and I stick to mine, eh?"

"You're right," Dolimus said, nodding.

"Well, it was good staying here and all, until this whole thing got sorted out. Thanks for the hospitality!" Packrat thanked him.

"Not a problem, guys. I have the telepipes marked, so Dolimus goes through the pipe behind that stick that I stuck in the ground."

"It was nice meeting you all... good-bye," Dolimus said, and walked into the telepipe, disappearing with it.

"Can I have another cookie?" Packrat asked.

"Packrat, we must take our leave, we have much to do in Kanto!"

"Yeah, I know... All right then! See you around, Dennis!"

"See you later, guys..." Dennis bid them, waving.

Packrat and Von Stupor stepped into the telepipe and vanished along with it.

"Now that everything's back to normal, I can finally continue my writing..."

So ended their journey in the realm of their creator.


	16. Rocket Rematch!

"Chapter 8: Rocket Rematch!"

By: Von Stupor

Baron Von Stupor and Packrat reappeared back in Mt. Moon as if they had never left.

"Well, now that that adventure is over, let's continue ours! How many potions you have left?" asked Packrat.

"I've plenty left, and I still have some money left over," Von Stupor replied.

"You know, it's kind of strange that we haven't seen a single Rocket in the cave since we squashed those two jokes back there."

"Perhaps it is their nap time?"

Packrat shot a strange look at him. "You know, they left awful quickly once I made my comeback. Maybe they told their idiot friends and ran away?"

"Wait a moment…" said Von Stupor, stooping to pick up an odd stone. "What is this?"

"Nice and pretty red color," Packrat complimented, nodding. "Impressive find you got there!"

Von Stupor lifted his mask a bit and licked the rock. Packrat visibly recoiled.

"What the hell is your problem?" he asked sharply.

Von Stupor continued to stare at the stone, dumbfounded.

"Hey, you awake! Gimme that!" Packrat demanded, snatching it out of Von Stupor's hand. Eying him oddly, he licked it himself. "Holy… mother of pearl…"

"'Tis odd, quiaff?" asked Von Stupor.

"It… it is! It freaking… Von Stupor, this rock tastes exactly like cherries!"

"Let me see it again," asked Von Stupor, taking the rock back. He carefully bit into it. "This is… cheese…"

"Some kind of 'mooncheese'? Wow!"

Packrat and Von Stupor giggled to themselves for a moment.

"Dude, let's try to find some more, I can't believe I found a cheese I actually like!" commented Packrat.

"I concur!"

As the two traversed the cave, they found bits and pieces of their newly discovered mooncheese scattered throughout the cave. Soon, they finally began to see light coming from around the corner. As they got closer, they began to see vague silhouettes of many people.

"No, stop! I found them, so they're mine!" they heard a nasal-sounding voice say.

"You fool! If you will not hand those fossils to us, we will take them by force!" shouted another.

"Noooooo!"

"Quick, Stupor! Let's go!" said Packrat to Von Stupor, and began running toward the silhouettes.

"Baron Von Stupor, away!" cried Stupor, following Packrat.

As they got closer, the silhouettes revealed themselves to be a horde of Rockets, scattered throughout the room. In front of them all stood a supernerd and the suited Rocket.

"There's nowhere else you can go. Hand over the fossils before someone gets hurt!" commanded the Rocket.

"No! They're mine!" replied the supernerd stubbornly.

"Hey, ugly!" Packrat called out.

All of the Rockets looked at him.

"Face it! It's not funny."

"What in the world are you talking about!" demanded the suited Rocket.

"What? Oh… so it wasn't a joke? You mean you were actually _trying_ to pass yourself off as someone big and tough? Boy, have you got a lot to learn!"

"How dare you!" he turned to the other lackeys and said, "What are you all waiting for! Get them!"

The other Rockets stood hesitant. One of the two that Von Stupor had defeated then spoke.

"We told the others about that rat. He's tough!" he whimpered.

"You're all weaklings! Fine, then! It appears that this will be a job for an official Team Rocket Admin to handle!"

The Rockets all spread out, creating a circle around Von Stupor and the Admin. Two Rockets subdued the supernerd.

"I'll choose Arbok!" said the Admin, and threw out a pokéball. Arbok popped out and leered at Von Stupor.

"I'll choose Spearow!" Von Stupor stated and threw out Spearow's pokéball.

"Arbok, use Poison Sting!" commanded the Admin.

"Spearow, dodge it and advance on it!" shouted Von Stupor.

Spearow jumped up and out of the way of the Poison Sting and fluttered closer to Arbok.

"Now, Arbok!" cried the Rocket leader. "Use your Wrap attack, quick!"

Arbok suddenly sprang into the air and caught Spearow. It fell back to the ground and began to tighten itself.

"Ha!" cheered the Admin.

_Predictable,_ Von Stupor thought to himself. "Now, Spearow, use Fury Attack, but concentrate your attacks all in one spot on Arbok's tail!"

Before Arbok could constrict it, Spearow began pecking furiously at its tail.

"Aaaaaaarboooooook!" cried the snake, and let go of Spearow, shrinking back in pain.

"Now, finish it off with a Peck attack in its head!" commanded Von Stupor.

Spearow took flight, and darted up, around, and dove at full speed, cracking its beak right between Arbok's eyes. The serpent fell over, instantly knocked out.

"Damn!" cursed the Admin, and called Arbok back to its pokéball. "Go, Machoke!" He threw out a second pokéball and out popped Machoke.

"Spearow, return!" commanded Von Stupor, returning the bird to its pokéball. He turned to Packrat and said, "You're next, friend."

"Pfft! Against that monster?" he asked sarcastically as the Machoke beat its chest.

"Of course! …Why not?"

"You hop in there for thirty seconds and find out!"

"Packrat, look out!"

Packrat flipped around to see Machoke's fist coming at him. He sidestepped it and glared at Machoke as its fist slammed into the ground in front of him.

"That was cheap!" he hissed, and gave the Machoke a scratch across its face.

Machoke reared its head back and roared in pain, and Packrat proceeded to kick it hard between its legs. It promptly doubled back over, clutching its battered genitalia.

Packrat then said, "How does _that_ feel, huh? Next time, play fair!"

He blew a raspberry in Machoke's face as it crumpled to the ground.

"No! Machoke, get up!" cried the Admin, but to no avail. "Grrr, return!"

He patted his waist and said aloud, "What the…! I'm out of usable pokémon! I… I lost!"

"You know, I gotta give you a lot of credit. Most people don't truly realize they suck at something until they notice that they never win and always lose," Packrat said with an arrogant grin. "But you just seem to refuse to accept that, and you just keep right on dreaming! It's actually kind of inspiring… in a depressing way."

The Rocket Admin said through clenched teeth, "I _have_ won in the past, and I will defeat you, too… in our rematch. Rockets, blast off!"

He threw a vial at the ground, which exploded into a large cloud of smoke. Once it cleared, the Rockets were gone, leaving only Von Stupor, Packrat, and the supernerd.

"Wow, that was so cool!" he exclaimed, wide-eyed. "You sure creamed those Rockets back there! What's your name?"

"I am Baron Von Stupor," he introduced. "…And this is my friend and companion, Packrat."

"Oh, I see. Concealing your real identity with the mask and all, huh? Well, in that case, you can refer to me by my internet alias, Kenshin Urameshi!"

Packrat raised an eyebrow and Von Stupor cocked his head to the side.

"I got it from the names of the main characters from the two most supercoolest, awesomest animes of all time, which are coincidentally my two favorite animes as well!" he snorked.

"Well, we _did_ save you," Packrat flatly commented after a brief, awkward silence between the three.

"Yes you did, thank you so much!" replied Kenshin.

"No, we _saved_ you. We don't get any kind of reward?"

"Packrat!" Von Stupor interjected.

"No, no, it's only fair. I have two fossils from the mountain, as you have no doubt overheard from the Rockets. If you want, you can have one of them."

"You would do that for us?" Von Stupor asked with excitement.

"Of course I would," Kenshin replied, lowering his voice shooting a leer at Packrat. "Call it a thank you for your kindness and _politeness._"

"Hey, I'm just—" started Packrat until he was elbowed by Von Stupor.

"'Tis a kind gift, but I am afraid I cannot accept something as magnanimous as this…"

"Nonsense, I want you to have it!" insisted Kenshin, holding them out. "Go ahead; I only really need one of them."

"Yoink!" spouted Packrat, snatching a fossil at random. "What's it from, anyway?" he asked, feeling the indents.

"That's the Helix fossil. They say it's the shell of an omanyte that is stuck inside it. You can tell by the layers outside of the imprint."

"Ahhh, pretty cool! Hey, let me know when you need saving again, man! Ha, ha!"

"…Yeah, I'll be sure to look you up."

"Alright, then. Well, I believe Mr. Stupor and I should be moving on. Catch you later, Kawasaki Taki! You're okay in my book!"

"Thanks for the support. …And that's Kenshin Urameshi!"

"Oh. Well, whatever. See ya!"

As the two parted ways with Kenshin, the light at the end of the tunnel brightened. Finally, they had reached Cerulean City, home of the second badge Von Stupor needed to further his quest to find Ash.


	17. Deep Blue Seaside Town!

"Chapter 9- Deep Blue Seaside Town!"

By: Von Stupor

"Hmmm… Helix fossil, omanyte… that all sounds pretty cool, and since this thing is prehistoric, it must have been pretty powerful and ugly!" Packrat pondered as he examined the fossil up close while wandering toward Cerulean City with Von Stupor.

"Yes… I wonder what it smelled like…" he joined in.

"What the… What?"

"Well, being prehistoric, I'm sure it had quite the unique smell."

"Yes, Mr. Stupor, you of _all people_ would care about how an extinct pokémon species used to smell."

"That I would, that I would."

Just then, they approached the pokécenter.

"So we're not just going to heal up here and fly into that gym fists flying, are we?" Packrat asked Von Stupor.

"No, 'twould be best to watch their styles for today, for it is nearly dark, and would do us well to rest easy tonight."

"That makes a lot of sense. There sure is a decent amount of strategy inside that maniacal little brain of yours, eh?"

Von Stupor chuckled in reply and the duo blundered into the gym. Inside, they saw large pools with many swimmers exercising. They were obviously trainers, as there was an abundance of water-type pokémon swimming with everyone else.

Baron Von Stupor sat in a corner and observed the various battles until closing time, whereupon they ventured to a local inn.

"Welcome!" said the shopkeeper. "The price is 5G. Will you stay?"

"Eh?" Von Stupor said in confusion.

The two stared at the shopkeeper, whose face was straight and had not changed since they walked in.

"His mouth did not even move—" started Von Stupor when he was cut off by Packrat.

"Yes, we will," he said, slapping five pokédollars on the counter.

They stared at the shopkeeper for a moment more, who in turn was staring straight forward still, motionless.

"Hey Stupor, you go on to bed, I want to explore around town a little bit," voiced Packrat suddenly.

"Very well. Please try not to be out too late."

"I ain't a child! Catch you later."

Packrat marched out of the building and headed towards a nearby bridge. The fading sunlight hampered his vision, but on a nearby sign, he made out 'NUGGET BRIDGE'.

_Interesting,_ he thought to himself, and pressed forth.

Upon crossing the bridge, he came upon a dirt path. Further down, he noticed a faint light, and decided to follow it. After meandering through some shrubbery, he came to a realization that the light was a candle, with a young boy and girl sitting behind it, close to each other. They both sat together in front of a shallow pond of water. Packrat crept forward until he was on the side of the pool opposite the couple. He peered harder to see the girl resting her head on the guy's shoulder, the guy holding his arm around her and resting his head on hers. They were having some sort of conversation, but Packrat was too far to hear.

_A date, no doubt,_ Packrat thought. _That girl looks a bit young to be getting intimate. Kee, hee, that might just be my curiosity talking though, because I wonder… ha ha… I wonder what would happen if I were to liven up the atmosphere!_ "Let's find out," he muttered aloud to himself and began to slither around the pool.

After some careful footwork, Packrat managed to find himself behind a bush, directly to the left of the couple. He waited and watched for the perfect moment. After a minute or two, the guy finally made his move. He began to move his face closer to hers and she closed her eyes. Just before his lips met hers, Packrat sprang over the bush and into the water in front of them, screaming wildly and frantically splashing water about, dousing the candle flame and couple accordingly. The couple leapt back, crying in surprise.

Packrat sat back in the water and began to laugh his brains out. After a moment, he heard a pokéball open and a flareon lit up the surroundings with a warm orange glow.

"That must be what did it, that rat-looking pokémon!" shouted the girl.

"It looks a lot like an oversized raticate! I'll take care of it! Go, Jolteon!" said the guy.

"What the…! I am _not_ a pokémon!" cried Packrat. "Why the crap does everyone keep think—"

Just then, a jolteon popped out of a pokéball. Packrat took one look at the electricity surging through the dog and glanced down toward the water surrounding him.

"_Oh crap,_" he gurgled.

He shot out of the water just as jolteon charged it with electricity, narrowly escaping. He then proceeded with tearing towards Nugget Bridge.

"Jolteon, chase it down and subdue it!" called the guy faintly from behind Packrat.

He looked behind him to see Jolteon keeping up with him rather well. Just then, the pooch shot a burst of electricity at Packrat, who leapt in the air as it passed under him. He felt his fur stand on end as it passed.

_What static! That must have been a Thunder Wave attack!_ thought Packrat to himself.

As he came down, he realized that he was going to hit a bush.

_Wah! It was a distraction! I'm gonna go down no matter what!_ he thought.

His shins clipped the bush and he was sent into a belly slide across the ground. After stopping, he looked behind him to see Jolteon skid to a halt.

"Look! A distraction!" cried packrat, pointing behind Jolteon.

As Jolteon stupidly looked the other way, Packrat grabbed a clump of dirt. It looked back at him in time for him to cry, "Mud Slap!" and throw the dirt in its face. It pawed to get the dirt out of its eye.

"Finish it off with a tackle, ha ha!" Packrat said to himself as he lunged at the pup.

He hit it, throwing them both into the stream. He grabbed it and said, "Still gonna zap me? You'll only hurt us both!"

Jolteon raised an eyebrow and bit Packrat's shoulder. He cried out in pain and countered with a punch to the gut, causing it to let go. He followed with a hard head butt, knocking it out cold.

Packrat held onto the jolteon and heaved it onto shore when he had a chance. He looked up to see a cave entrance. As he walked inside, he heard Jolteon pipe up.

"Huh? Uh-oh— wait. You sound frightened," observed Packrat. "What, you're scared of the cave?"

It yapped at him and stared cautiously.

"Well, if I come out there, you're just gonna zap me. If you wanna go back home, we floated from up there," said Packrat, pointing upstream. "Joltie-paddle up there, or something."

He turned to venture inside and Jolteon began yapping again.

Packrat stopped, turned and said, "Hey, I'm going in here whether you want me to or not. Au revoir."

With that, he ignored Jolteon's yapping and continued inside. It felt rather damp and moist. He saw a light protrude from around the corner. He followed it to discover it was coming from an electrode. It turned and looked at him, but indifferently went back to sleep.

_Must be recharging,_ Packrat thought to himself.

As Packrat left the Electrode's dome of light, he began to feel his way along the dank corridors. Moonbeams pierced the ceiling, sending lasers of thin light throughout the catacombs, scattered and sporadic as he ventured deeper into the abyss. He passed many pokémon who were aggressive at first, but paid him no mind on seeing him. Confused and curious, he journeyed further. Finally, something made his hair stand on end.

_Why have you come to my sanctuary?_ he thought.

"Wait," he said aloud. "I didn't think that… There's another voice inside my head!"

_You are correct…_ he heard once more.

"What the…!" he grunted, and darted his head around.

All of the pokémon in the room were looking at him, when suddenly, from out of the shadows hovered a creature so horrifying, it sent a chill down his spine.

Packrat could only look in shock at the monstrosity's vague silhouette.

_I am speaking to your through your mind, as I haven't the anatomy to communicate physically,_ said the creature. _If you were either human or pokémon would have destroyed all traces of you. However, because you are neither, you were spared._

"Wh-wh-why!" Packrat sputtered.

_The reason is because I detected your presence from a distance away. I have hopes that you may be the one who can help me._

"You know, you never got a reason from me on why I came here…"

_It is not needed now, I already know. Be it luck or be it fate, an unseen force brought you here._

"Okay… uh, can I go now…? I have to go, uh… cry softly. …In a corner somewhere… other than here."

_Because of your unique nature, I believe that you may be able to help me mend my wounds, to help my make my pain go away._

"Wh… me? How?"

_That I will not tell you. You journey on an adventure with a friend, a pokémon adventure. In time, along this journey, you will learn what to do, and in doing so, will be prepared._

"Why me?"

_I despise humans with a fiery passion, and pokémon are merely slaves meant for capture and enjoyment. You, however, you are neither human nor pokémon. You are something more, you can feel what pokémon feel; you have the heart of a pokémon. Yet, you can live and breathe among the humans, like one of their own; you have the free mind and spirit of a human. With these traits in tow, you will gain a vast advantage over all pokémon in battle, despite your lack of special ability. I accredit to this the possibility of my mind finally becoming freed of its sorrow, of its pain. Now then, my request has been made. Sleep now… Remember only my name, and within it, you will feel only my sorrow… Mewtwo…_

Darkness.


	18. Aquatic Assault!

**Okay guys, celebration is over and it's time to get back to the story! We've missed out on quite a bit and I'm sure I've bored away plenty of potentially faithful readers. I apologize to those and all currently faithful readers for this unfortunate mishap, but I can bid with confidence that this will never happen again. I now have copies of my documents on CD, computer, and jump drive, which when it is not being used for file transfer, it is safely stored away in my desk drawer, part of the computer desk. My fiction is here to stay! Nothing will be discontinued, all will be finished, WOO-HOO! Alright then, first I'd also like to give a couple shout-outs to those who have helped me along the way.**

**First off, I'd like to thank Packrat, Von Stupor, and Dolimus for all their support. ;)**

**Then there's Funkygal-Yami/Tea Fan, who posted some chapters while the site refused to cooperate with my pokey 33k dial-up internet connection, lol. She posted four chapters for me.**

**I would also like to thank Sean (AKA Radical R) for recovering my laptop data. BIG thanks to him, I'd have kissed him if he couldn't beat me up. Well, not really, but the thought was there. Well...moving on. ahem**

**I would also like to mention keeper-of-the-triforce again, since she seemed so flabbergasted when I had mentioned her name twice in my fanfictions.**

**With that out of the way and with no more delay, I present chapter ten of 'Pokémon Gray: Special Baron Von Stupor Edition'!**

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"Chapter 10: Aquatic Assault!"

By: Von Stupor

_Packrat... Packrat..._ rang a voice inside Packrat's head.

He jolted awake to find himself in Baron Von Stupor's inn room, laying on the bed. Von Stupor was calling his name.

"What the...?! What happened?" Packrat asked, confused.

"I would not know, I was asleep. We must go challenge the Cerulean gym leader!"

"Man, I remember running from a jolteon last night, but the rest is a total blur... Ah, whatever. Let's go!"

They strolled out of the inn and off to the gym.

Von Stupor approached a female swimmer and asked about the gym leader.

"Oh, Misty? She'll be here in about twenty minutes," she said in reply, raising an eyebrow. "Why?"

"I wish to challenge her to a battle!" bipped Von Stupor energetically.

"Well, if you can't beat me, you certainly can't beat her. Battle me instead!"

"You know," Packrat said in a snotty tone. "there's a distinct reason why you're called a _junior_ trainer..."

Von Stupor elbowed him and he glanced back.

"Well for your information, I'm referred to as a SWIMMER♀, and there are plenty of powerful SWIMMER♀s swarming the waters south of Pallet Town. Besides, how many badges do you have? Just one? Ha, ha! Who's a junior trainer now?"

"How many badges do _you_ have? Just none? Ha, ha! I guess you just decided to hide your crapulence behind your gym leader, then? Yes, I believe that you, as a trainer, are beneath both me and Mr. Stupor here."

Von Stupor shifted his weight nervously.

"Prove it!!! I wanna take you down, you stupid rat!"

"Bring it on, FAILURE♀!"

"I'll start things off with Horsea!" cried the girl, throwing a pokéball. Out came a Horsea. It bobbled back and forth, balancing on its tail.

Von Stupor curiously pulled out his pokédex and pointed it at the creature.

"Horsea," it spoke. "The sea horse pokémon. It is known to shot down bugs with blasts of ink from the surface of the water."

"Hurry up!" the SWIMMER♀ ordered impatiently.

Packrat looked at Von Stupor and began pitter-pattering his feet anxiously. Sighing, Von Stupor said, "Packrat, go on."

"Yeah!" whooped the rodent and jumped into battle.

"Horsea, use Bubble!" commeanded the SWIMMER♀.

Horsea obediently shot a stream of bubbles at Packrat.

Laughing, he sputtered, "What the heck kind of sissy attack is--"

Just then, the bubbles splattered across his face, knocking him back a few steps. He clutched his face, gritting his teeth.

"Agh, okay, I'll give you that one..." he muttered. "...but you won't be so friggin' lucky twice! Count on it!"

"Packrat, get in close and--" started Von Stupor.

"I know what to do! Just let me do my thing!"

Packrat began charging at the horsea.

"Hit him with another Bubble attack!" the SWIMMER♀ commanded once more.

Packrat leapt over the bubbles, crying, "It's time for my Pound attack!"

He came down on top of the horsea with a hard knuckle punch to its cranium. The force sent the horsea slamming to the ground, head first.

"Follow up with a Mega Kick!" he grunted, giving the sea horse the hardest punt he could muster. The kick sent horsea flying into the arms of its trainer, knocking them both into the nearby pool.

"Woo-hoo!!! Let's see, damage plus time, tack on Double KO, Half-Minute Man, Never Look Back, Offensive Master, No R 4 U, Stiff Knees, Marathon Man..." Packrat babbled, counting on his fingers. "Wow! I can't even come up with a total, let alone tack on all the possible bonuses! Should I shoot for Edge Hog, too?"

"I think you have damaged her pride enough, Packrat..." said Von Stupor forlornly. "Mine image as well..."

By now, all of the swimmers were glaring at Packrat and Von Stupor.

"Hey, it's not my fault she got caught in the crossfire!" giggled Packrat.

"Eh, perhaps we should return on a happier day, packrat. Let us leave--"

"Not so fast!" shouted a young girl behind them.

The two flipped around to see a young, red-haired girl leering at them angrily. She was wearing a yellow sleeveless shirt tucked into a pair of daisy-dukes held up by suspenders.

"Not to anger you further, but your pig tail..." Von Stupor observed, pointing at her. "You missed."

She continued her serious stare, raising an eyebrow.

"You missed the back of your head," he elaborated. "It's on the side--"

"_That's my hair style, you idiot!!!_" she yelled, causing Von Stupor to shrink back. She then pointed at Packrat, who had been gawking in shock, mouth wide open. ""...And you've also got a lot of nerve bringin that thing to my turf after what it did to me last night!"

Von Stupor looked at Packrat, who shrugged his shoulders with a weak smile.

"That's right, I'd never forget a pokémon like that! It ruined my date, and even escaped my date's jolteon!"

Von Stupor continued to stare at Packrat.

"Hey, don't stare at me like that! Come on, it was armless fun!"

"Now, as Cerulean City's gym leader, I will make you pay for the chaos you've been causing around town!"

"You are a gym leader?" asked Von Stupor.

"Yes, and I hereby challenge you to a pokémon battle!"

"_Yay!!!_ Okay!"

"You won't be so happy-go-lucky when I crush you with my mighty water tactics!"

The crew walked into the official battle arena and stood on either side. The arena was a large pool, with floating platforms positioned throughout it, chained to the pool's floor.

"Our official battles are one-on-one team battles, and you must defeat your opponent's team to win!" Misty instructed Von Stupor.

He nodded with agreement.

"Alright, I'll start off with Staryu!" she cried and threw out her pokémon.

Out from the pokéball popped a large orange starfish. In its core was an enormous encrusted jewel.

Von Stupor pulled out the pokédex and scanned it.

"Staryu, the starfish pokémon," it told him. "This is an enigmatic pokémon that can effortlessly regenerate any appendage it may lose in battle."

Von Stupor thought for a moment and put the pokédex away prior to pulling out a pokéball.

"Spearow!" he called. "'Tis time to act!"

Staryu sat on a platform as Spearow popped out of its ball and fluttered about in the air, squawking fiercely.

"Staryu, dive into the water and use your Water Gun attack!"

The mollusk obediently leapt into the water and fired a spray of water at Spearow.

"Spearow, dodge it!" cried Von Stupor, and the bird quickly shifted out of the stream's path. "Counter with Peck!"

It proceeded to dive at Staryu.

"Quick Staryu, dive into the water!"

"Spearow, pull up! Pull up!!!"

Staryu sank into the water and Spearow broke out of its nosedive inches before hitting the water. It skimmed across the water a ways prior to climbing back into the air.

"Staryu, go for a Tackle attack!"

Staryu then launched itself from the depths, heading straight for Spearow.

"Spearow, doge it and use Gust as it passes!"

Spearow side dodged it and flapped its wings wildly at the staryu. the wind caused it to overshoot, sending it out of the pool's perimeter. It flopped across the floor and crashed into the wall, hard.

"Do it now, Spearow!" crid Von Stupor. "Hit it with the hardest Peck you can muster!"

Spearow began a nosedive straight downard, toward the water and turned upward, building momentum. It then repeated the action, this time breaking out of the dive and shooting straight across the ground and while spinning, planted its beak right into Staryu's jewel, cracking it. Instantly, the jewel began to pulse with light.

"Wow," Packrat observed with surprise. "Must've learned Drill Peck..."

"Impressive!" said Von Stupor as Misty returned Staryu to its pokéball.

Spearow hovered in the air above the pool, waiting for further orders.

"I'm not out yet!" cried misty, agitated. She pulled out another pokéball and threw it. "Go, Starmie!"

Out came Starmie as Packrat said to Von Stupor, "Now is it just me? ...Or are am I starting to notice a sort of trend with these names?"

"I'll keep Spearow out," Von Stupor thought out loud, ignoring him.

"Time's up! Starmie, get in the water and use Bubblebeam!" commanded Misty.

In the water hpped Starmie and shot a concentrated burst stream of bubbles from its upper appendage, aiming for Spearow.

"Spearow, dodge, quick!!!" ordered Von Stupor.

"It's going too fast!" cried packrat.

Before Spearow could get out of the way, the stream hit it hard, shoving it into a wall. When the attack ended, Spearow fell to the ground and could not move.

"Spearow, return!" called Von Stupor as the pokéball's red beam inhaled the bird.

"Your turn," he said to Packrat.

"Well..." he replied. "Ain't got much choice now, do I?"

He leapt out onto one of the platforms. "Let's go, freak!"

"Starmie, use Bubblebeam!" commanded Misty.

Starmie poked its uppermost appendage out of the water and shot its bubbly burst stream.

Packrat immediately dropped to the ground, back facing up and the beam followed him down and barely grazed the top of his head, given the off angle from whence it came.

"Ha! Your land-based animal is no match for my aquatic terrors!" taunted Misty.

"You wanna bet?!" cried Packrat, and leapt into the water.

"Packrat, no!!!" shouted Von Stupor as Misty began laughing.

"Now he's on _my_ turf!" she giggled. "Starmie, use Dive!"

Starmie sank further down into the pool depths. Packrat stopped swimming a quarter way down and looked around.

All of a sudden, Starmie shot from nowhere and while spinning like a throwing star, struck Packrat square in his back. Realizing his stupid mistake, he began scrambling back towards the surface of the water.

"Starmie, cut him off with Confusion!" ordered Misty.

The pokémon obediently shot in front of Packrat and flared its gem a multitude of colors in his face.

Attempting to retaliate, Packrat made a pathetic swipe at Starmie. It made no attempt to move as Packrat missed it by a rather large margin. He decided to continue his scramble for the surface, his air running low. His confusion sent him at an off angle.

"Starmie, finish him off with a Tackle attack!" commanded Misty.

Starmie floated backward some and launched itself at packrat again, hitting him in his side with such force, he was hurled out of the water and tumbled across a floating platform. Almost falling off the other side, he clung for dear life to the edge.

"Yeah!" whooped Misty, the other spectating swimmers cheering.

Suddenly, everyone quieted and stared in shock at Packrat, beginning to stand up on the platform.

"I'm not... done yet..." he murmured, wobbling to and fro as he slowly and steadily rose to his feet. His eyes were droopy, one half open, and his words were a tad slurred from his confusion.

"That's impossible!" cried Misty, stomping her foot.

"Hah... stupid water advantage..."

Just then, Packrat finally crumpled back down, wheezing out, "Yeah... I'm done."

Misty wiped a panicked bead of sweat from her forehead and said, "Yeah... I won."

The two trainers immediately headed out to revive their pokémon. Baron Von Stupor held his head a bit low for the course of the trip. Once their respective pokémon (and Packrat) were healed, Misty approached the two travellers.

"That should teach you a lesson for picking on smaller trainers and embarrassing them like you did!" she scolded Von Stupor.

"Me? But I did not--" he started, but she cut him off and moved on to Packrat.

"As for _you,_ I told you I wouldn't let you get away with wrecking my date! What do you think about that, you wise-cracking little rodent?"

"Fair enough," he replied indifferently, shrugging his shoulders.

"What? Even after I kicked your butt, you don't even care?"

"Well, you got your paybacks, so now we're even. So what?"

She gaped at him. "D-don't you even feel sorry at all for what you did?!"

Rolling his eyes, he responded, "Pfft, why would I? Totally crashing your date was fun! Worth the trouble, too!"

She immediately attempted to slap him, but he ducked under the swing and leapt onto her, giving her a sloppy, wet kiss. When he landed back on the ground, she wiped her face with her forearm and stared at him, flames in her eyes.

He pointed at her and said, "You brought that one on yourself. Let's see you kiss your date with those lips now!"

Packrat bolted out the door and misty followed in hot pursuit, screaming, "_I'm gonna farking kill you!!!_"

Von Stupor simply shook his head and walked outside.

"Hey Ash!" called a familiar voice from inside the pokécenter. Von Stupor turned around to see Gary Oak.

"Greetings, Gary! Gary, greetings!" Von Stupor greeted him.

"Huh? Whatever," he said, coming outside. "So, still dragging behind, are ya?"

"Eh, put a little behind after being beaten by Misty."

"Hah! You lost to someone who only uses water pokémon? You must be sad!"

"Her tactics were rather unscrupulous..."

"Why didn't you just use an electric-type pokémon? Oh, don't tell me you don't have a pikachu..."

"I... do not..."

"Ha, ha! You're pathetic! But of course only a _serious_ trainer such as myself would have been able to catch a pikachu while he had the chance in Viridian Forest."

"There... are pikachu in Viridian Forest?"

Gary simply laughed in reply, and Von Stupor sank his head a bit.

"Yep, that sure isn't a good way to get your pokédex filled out, now is it? Try doing a little research on the side, bud, and you might be just a teensy weensy bit less terrible! Anyways, I can certainly tell right now how horrible a job you've been doing as a trainer so far, and I _was_ going to challenge you to a battle, but I guess I'll just be nice and reconsider for now. Next time, you won't be that lucky! With that, I guess I'll go and further my lead, Ashy-boy. Smell ya later!"

As Gary left, Packrat approached Von Stupor, wearing white bathroom towels, one wrapped around his body and one around his head.

"I think I lost her with this disguise... boy was she ever hot, heh heh..." he snickered.

"She was _what???_"

:She was _mad,_ dummy! Only way that girl could ever be attractive is if she were someone else."

"Oh. Packrat, I... don't think I may be cut out to be a trainer..."

"_What???_ What brings out this sudden change in attitude, man?"

"I conversed with Gary a moment ago. He pointed out several flaws with my tactics."

"Well, as long as he doesn't point out your eye with that hair of his, you'll be perfectly fine."

Von Stupor simply sat on a bench and stared at the ground.

"Come on dude, don't make me start caring in front of all these people."

"Packrat, I have made many critical errors on my journey!"

"So what??? You're just starting out. You're on what, level 2 out of 8? ...And you're just gonna give up, just like that? Come on, stupid! You're above all that! This is like, the tutorial part of the game! You haven't even scratched the surface, either! It's not like you threw yourself into the middle of the last level, or something like that!"

"This is not a mere video game, Packrat, this is life!"

"Dummy, I used an _analogy._ Look at it this way. You have one pokémon. Two if you wanna cheat and count me as one."

"So?"

Packrat sighed and said, "Musty said earlier that their official battles are team battles, and that you win by beating the opponent's team."

Von Stupor stared cluelessly.

Packrat then said with a sarcastic smile, "Okay Stupor, you wanna know why you suck? _You're not thinking about the possibilities!!!_ You just sit there and think, 'Well golly-gee, I lost once, that must mean I'll lose _eeeeeeeevery_ time!' You don't think about why you lost, you just sit there and brood over the fact that you did! Get it in your head, _everybody loses sometimes,_ it's a fact of nature! Get used to it! It's gonna happen! Sheesh! Besides, you also took that Gary guy seriously, I can't even believe you did that."

"Hmmm... I think I understand now... you're right, Packrat! One can't know if they're cut out or not from one loss, as losing is bound to happen sometime! 'Tis losing that makes us stronger, not winning, and in turn, prepares us for the newer challenges that lie ahead! Therefore I shall analyze my loss, and rectify the problem, and then challenge Misty again! But... There is no way back to Mt. Moon, so I cannot get a pikachu, and to go back for one would be a grand waste of time..."

"Tut, tut, my friend. You think that's the _only_ reason why you lost? Think about what I said ealier. _Team_ battles?"

"Well... if... I could not defeat her with _two_ pokémon..."

"Eeeexactly," Packrat agreed, winking at him.

Von Stupor snapped his fingers and said, "I must collect more pokémon and defeat her by strength in number!!!"

"There you go!" rooted Packrat, thumping him on the back. "Let's go get 'em!"

Von Stupor jumped up and tore off towards Mt. Moon.


	19. An Enemy Emerges!

**Well then, this is an exciting chapter. A new character gets introduced, one entirely original! And let's just say he wears a mask...**

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Chapter 11: An Enemy Emerges!"

By: Von Stupor

"I don't get it; we can't get back to Mt. Moon from here, Stupor. We'll have to go around if you expect to get a pikachu from Viridian Forest. It's pretty much not even worth it," griped Packrat.

"My aim is not for a pikachu as that chance has already passed. Time to improvise! There is a field of pokémon close by. We shall begin catching pokémon there!" he replied.

"Hmmm, maybe you're right. After all, different things can lurk in different places, I guess."

As Von Stupor approached the field, he saw a strange creature digging for something in the dirt. He pulled out his pokédex and pointed it at the beast.

"Sandshrew," it garbled. "the Mouse pokémon. This creature is not often seen above ground, unless searching for a quick snack or quenching its thirst at a nearby stream."

"Perfect… Packrat, are you ready?" he asked.

"Whatever. What's the attack plan?" he coldly replied.

"Hmm, try to scare it, maybe you can stun it."

"Actually, I got a better idea. Watch this. Get back."

Von Stupor sat back and Packrat crunched down behind a nearby bush. He heightened the tone of his voice and called coyly, "Sandshrew… sandshrew! Tee hee!"

The pokémon perked its ears up and began to follow the sound.

"Saaaaaandshrew…"

It spread the bush apart and stared Packrat right in the face.

"Hey there sexy," he said, and socked it square between the eyes.

The sandshrew fell back, stunned and Packrat jumped up and began screaming.

"_Gaaaaaaaah, the thing's built like a friggin' brick, that hurt!_" he cried.

Von Stupor whipped out a pokéball and threw it at the sandshrew, hitting it. It was sucked into the ball and began to struggle. The ball bounced around a bit and the sandshrew popped right back out. It squeaked and ran away.

"I think not, my armored friend," said Von Stupor and tossed out Spearow's pokéball.

The spearow flew out of it and looked at Von Stupor.

"Track the sandshrew and cut it off, I must capture it!" he ordered, and the bird obediently flew after it.

"Are you okay, Packrat?" asked Von Stupor.

"I'll live. Think I broke a bone, though. Go get the pokémon, it might escape! I'll catch up!"

Von Stupor nodded and ran towards the spearow's calling. He arrived near the bottom of a cliff that led to Mt. Moon. There the sandshrew was kicking some dirt up at the bird, defending itself.

"Spearow, use Gust!" called Von Stupor.

Spearow obediently sent a massive current of air at the sandshrew, blowing away the dust and throwing it against the cliff. It sat there, stunned for a moment.

"Now, finish it with Drill Peck!"

The bird slammed its beak into the sandshrew's chest, knocking its wind out. Von Stupor threw another pokéball at it and after a very brief struggle, the pokémon was captured.

Von Stupor rooted and shortly after, Packrat came bumbling forth.

"Yeah, my fingers are feeling worse by the minute. You get him?" he said.

"Most certainly, and now I have three pokémon for my army against Misty!"

"_Two._"

"Right, I have two plus one placebo."

"Almost makes it sound negative…"

Von Stupor chuckled and headed back towards Cerulean City.

"So uh, Stupor… suppose we don't make the pokémon league. What'll we do then? They won't even let us into Indigo Plateau without all eight badges," Packrat mentioned.

"Hmmm, I suppose we could find out where the boy lives. Judging by his rival's ramblings, he seems to live near Professor Oak."

"Yeah, why don't we just take the bag there? Surely Jimmy Needles knows where his gramps lives, why don't we ask him next time he harasses us?"

"Will he harass us again?"

"Heh, if I know that jerk correctly, I'd say it's inevitable."

"Ah."

"You didn't answer my question, though… why don't we just take the bag to Ash's house and move on with our vacation?"

"Wouldn't it be more fun to do this? I mean, what would we do for our vacation?"

"Dude! There's Seagallop Ferries, and Johto's right next door to this region, we could go there! There's no way we'll compete in the pokémon league _and_ have time to visit Johto…"

"But…"

"Wait a minute… my common sense is tingling. This stupid sack isn't your only reason for doing this… is it?"

"I don't understand your words."

"Did you have other reasons for coming here? So far, the ones you've given me are pretty stupid."

"…none that I can think of."

"Okay, okay, fine, I'll play the 'mysterious game' with you and leave the subject alone. I'll figure it out sooner or later. Don't know why you won't tell me, though, it's not like we're not friends, or anything."

Von Stupor continued walking without saying a word.

"Hey, wh-where are you going?" asked Packrat, stopping suddenly.

Von Stupor pointed at a sign that said 'NUGGET BRIDGE'.

"Ha ha ha, I think we don't really have to go up there…"

"Well, I suppose we could stop at the pokécenter first…"

"Then beat Pissty and head towards Vermilion, right?"

"No, I'd like to examine this Nugget Bridge before we go. Might as well see the sights in addition to our vacation, hm?"

Packrat nervously chuckled and went to the pokécenter with Von Stupor.

After healing up the party, the team headed for Nugget Bridge. As they crossed, they saw the silhouette of a man wearing a cape. When they reached the end, the man stood before them. He was of a bit shorter than Von Stupor's height and sported a white shirt with a large, over lined letter 'P' on the front as a design. He wore light blue colored jeans with white shoes, similar in comparison to Von Stupor's. Around his neck he wore a baby blue colored blanket as a cape. Perhaps his strangest feature was that we wore an odd mask, resembling a face with two stacked red stripes of war paint lining his cheeks, a brown stripe for each eyebrow and a blue line that journeyed down his forehead partway prior to heading back up in a symmetrical fashion. The eyes were very striking, a pure white with no pupils. The entire mask bore a battle ready look. Attached to the top of the mask was a gray hat, shaped like a cylindrical pyramid, the hat brim a darker shade of gray. The hat drooped down to just beneath his shoulder line, covering his entire hair area, rendering its color a mystery.

He stood in the middle of the bridge, his arms crossed, staring Von Stupor down.

"Hey, welcome to Japan, sir. Mardi gras ain't practiced here. Mind clearing our path?" Packrat asked snidely.

The masked figure continued staring at Von Stupor.

"Come on, let's go around him," said Packrat, marching around the man.

Von Stupor took a step and the man said coolly, "Greetings, Baron Von Stupor."

"You know me?" asked Von Stupor, surprised. He was a bit nervous.

"I've been following you for a long time, Vonny boy. That's an interesting pack you have there. Never known you to… carry a lot of extra luggage like that."

"Only in my cope! Someone actually lost this bag along their journey and I found it. How unfortunate for them, yes? Anyways, I would like to chat, but I must hurry! Limited time, you know."

"Aw, why the rush? I'm sure you could stay for a while. Sure is an inconvenience for whoever lost that bag, hm? I could take it off of your hands, if you wish."

"I could never do such a thing! 'Twould be the wrong thing to do!"

"Well how do you think the bag's owner feels about losing it, huh?"

"Why, he must feel terrible! Hopefully he has been coping fine without it since…"

"You don't think he wants it back, do you?"

"I am sure he misses it terribly."

"Heh… you're so arrogant. I didn't expect much compliance from someone who acts the way you do."

"Eh?"

"You're so self-righteous, thinking that there's absolutely nothing wrong with anything you do! Well I have some news for you, buddy: I'm not buying that. Give me that bag."

"What? Never!"

"Hand over the bag or there will be some serious repercussions, I will not ask so nicely again!"

"Hey there, caped wonder! Where do you get off telling us what to do!" Packrat interrupted.

The man looked to see himself sandwiched between an angry Packrat and Von Stupor, ready for anything.

"Hmph. Now a double-team? I didn't think you'd stoop _that _low," said the man. "Call me Baron Von Engar, and you'll see me again; that, I promise you."

Baron Von Engar then dove off of the bridge. Packrat and Von Stupor ran to the edge to look for him, but saw nothing.

"Way to go, Stupor!" said Packrat, slapping his arm. "For absolutely no reason at all, you've just made a brand new enemy! Aren't you proud of yourself?"


	20. Returning for a Rematch!

Chapter 12: Returning for a Rematch!

By: Von Stupor

"Who… in the world… _was_ that guy?" Packrat asked Von Stupor, dumbfounded.

"I… I don't know! What does he want with my bag?" he wondered in reply.

"Well, let's keep going," ordered Packrat, and walked past Von Stupor.

"Packrat, you are headed toward Cerulean City…"

"I know!"

"We're going to the other end of Nugget Bridge."

"…I know…" he whined, and rejoined Von Stupor.

Together, they ventured along the path that he had just been chased down the following night. They soon approached the pond, the site of the ruined date. Near it was a house.

"Ooh! A residence!" chirped Von Stupor, and jogged over to the home.

Packrat followed behind, observing his surroundings. As Von Stupor poked at the door, it curiously opened. He walked in, and found a large mess of paperwork scattered across the tiny residence. Just then, a weird creature popped out from under a table.

It looked at Von Stupor and said, "Hiya! I'm a POKéMON…"

"That says it all, Stupor! Get a pokéball!" cried Packrat, leaping over him.

It then saw Packrat and yelled out, "_Hey!_ You're the one that ruined my date with Misty last—"

He was then slapped down by Packrat.

"A pokémon on a date with Misty? 'Tis very wrong!" Von Stupor recoiled, pointing his pokédex at the pokémon.

"Psyduck, the Duck pokémon," buzzed the computer. "Always tormented by headaches. When its headache intensifies, it uses psychokinetic powers, but it is not known if it intends to do so. It has no recollection of its powers, so it always looks befuddled and bewildered."

"Get the pokéball, damn it!" Packrat ordered, knocking the psyduck around helplessly.

It made a movement to escape and Packrat grabbed it by its feet. It yelled loudly and wildly kicked at Packrat, but could not escape.

"Pokéball, go!" cried Von Stupor, throwing the ball with all his might at the creature.

It hit the psyduck with a thwack and sucked it inside. It wrestled around for a brief moment and the ball then signified a successful capture.

"Way to go, Stupor! We got him!" cheered Packrat, lying across the floor.

"Yay! Two and two make four!" gloated Von Stupor.

"…and that makes two more ways we're gonna leave Misty all washed up!"

"Indeed! Let us go!"

The two whizzed back to Cerulean City as fast as their feet could carry them. Von Stupor ran his troops through the pokécenter and raced back to the gym.

Von Stupor thundered through the doors and walked briskly over to Misty.

"What are you two doing back here?" she asked, a stern tone in her voice.

"We are here to challenge you to a rematch, Misty! Double or nothing!" Von Stupor announced firmly.

"Double or nothing? You can't receive anything more from me than a badge. Even so, you disrespected my gym! What makes you think I shouldn't just ban you from it?"

"The fact that you wouldn't mind whipping up on Stupor again," commented Packrat.

As Von Stupor looked at him, Misty stroked her chin.

"I guess you're right… kind of. What I _really_ wouldn't mind is crushing _you_ again, you little rat."

"I wouldn't mind crushing your face, wench!" threatened Packrat, shaking his fist.

Misty gave him a quick slap across the face and he was caught by Von Stupor before he could lunge at her. She hopped back in reaction and laughed at him.

"You're gonna pay for that one! That's all you can rely on in battle anyways, right? Cheapass tactics!" Packrat yelled at her.

"_Hey!_" she yelled back. "It's not cheap to use the water to your advantage; this is a _water-type_ pokémon gym! It's called strategy!"

"It's called _cheap_, and I'm gonna embarrass you even more by beating your tactics with honor!"

Packrat pushed Von Stupor away from him and crossed his arms angrily.

"I'll see you in the arena," she taunted, and walked away.

Von Stupor followed close behind. They got on either side of the pool and readied themselves for battle.

"Send me out first, Stupor," said Packrat.

"I cannot, you are my trump card! I must lead with psyduck…" argued Von Stupor.

"Von Stupor, I'm pissed, send me out first!"

Sighing, Von Stupor obliged. "I'll send out Packrat first!"

Packrat leapt out into the pool, landing on a platform.

"I'll start with Staryu!" announced Misty, and threw Staryu out. "Get in the water, quick!"

Staryu obeyed her command and hopped into the water.

_Here goes nothing,_ thought Packrat to himself.

"Staryu, use Tackle attack!"

The Staryu shot out of the water with blinding speed and Packrat dropped to his belly, barely missing it.

"Staryu, use Bubble attack!"

The Staryu stuck its appendage out of the water and launched a volley of bubbles at Packrat.

_I'm not gonna be fooled by that again,_ thought Packrat, and leapt across the water to another platform, closer to Misty.

"Packrat, why aren't you attack—" started Von Stupor.

"Shut up, Stupor! I got it." Packrat snapped back, cutting him off.

Von Stupor shrunk in recoil and began to casually look around the room.

"Staryu, try another Tackle attack!"

The staryu shot at Packrat like a throwing start once more, and Packrat simply stood there. The mollusk struck him in his chest with a fierce thwack, and the blow caused him to wobble backward towards the edge. He cried out in pain from the impact and clutched his chest with one hand.

"You idiot!" he screamed at Staryu, who had been grounded from its collision with Packrat. "No wonder starfish don't have brains!"

"Oh, no! He's on the land!" gasped Misty. "Staryu, get in the water, quick!"

"I dun' think so," remarked Packrat, stamping his foot down on Staryu's appendage.

He gave two quick scratches to Staryu's appendage as Misty commanded it to perform Rapid Spin.

The starfish twisted itself around with such force that it freed itself from Packrat's body weight and nearly hit him, had he not stepped back. He came close to falling into the water before he regained his balance.

"Staryu, use Water Gun, now!" Misty called.

Staryu, jumping upright, obeyed its command and shot a stream of water out of its appendage at Packrat. Packrat sidestepped this and was struck in the shoulder. The force twisted him around a bit, but otherwise did not faze him.

He stepped forward and slapped Staryu down, its jewel facing downward. Packrat then gave it a fierce kick. It fell into the water whereupon Packrat hopped in after it. He grabbed it underwater and held it close to his body, its jewel still facing inward. He gave it two hard, swift knee thrusts.

"Staryu, use Harden!" Misty commanded.

Suddenly, Packrat's battery of its soft tissue became ineffective as it toughened up. He began scratching it with all his might.

"Staryu, use Rapid Spin!" called Misty.

The staryu began thrashing wildly in the water, and Packrat held a tight grip on it. It was then that he began running out of air. He pushed the staryu away and stared it down menacingly. Suddenly, it became very still, and stopped responding to Misty's shouts. Packrat emerged on the surface of the water and took a deep breath of air. He shot back underwater as the starfish began inching away slowly.

"Oh, no…" Misty moaned. "Staryu's become paralyzed… he must have used Glare on it!"

Packrat swam over to it and with a mighty bite, dug his teeth into Staryu's appendage. Staryu began to thrash some more, weakly. Packrat battered its soft spot where he had bitten a bit more and drug it towards the surface of the water. Upon gasping another breath, he hoisted the creature back onto the land at the edge of the pool, in front of Misty. He held the pokémon over his head and slammed it down in front of her, glaring and panting. Staryu's jewel began to blink.

"You… you beat a water pokémon on its own turf! Staryu, return…" Misty commanded, returning the pokémon to its ball.

Packrat jumped back over to his starting platform and gestured for Misty to come on prior to putting up his fists.

"Packrat…" Von Stupor said to him. Packrat flashed a cocky grin in reply.

"Fine, I'll choose… Starmie!" called Misty, throwing a pokéball to her starting platform. Starmie popped out and undulated its appendages. "Starmie, use Bubblebeam!"

The pokémon launched the beam of bubbles at Packrat, who jumped into the air, going towards Starmie's platform. Upon landing, he slammed a fist on top of Starmie, knocking it down. He gave it a fierce stomp.

"Starmie, use Harden and follow up with Rapid Spin!" commanded Misty.

The Starmie toughened up its skin and proceeded to spin itself into the air, hitting Packrat into the water.

"You're not gonna beat my Starmie in the water, too! I'd never forgive myself if I let that happen! Starmie, get in there and use Psybeam!"

Starmie jumped in and was greeted by an angry leer from Packrat. A chill was sent through it in that it lost its concentration on maintaining its superior defense. It returned with a psybeam in which Packrat cunningly spun around backwards and started to swim away.

"Starmie, use a Tackle attack!"

The sea animal obediently shot at Packrat, spinning. Packrat, hearing the command from Misty, swam deeper. The starmie, being fooled, curled upward in an attempt to intercept Packrat's predicted escape route. It shot out of the water and across the arena. Packrat then turned and swam upward and climbed back onto the platform in front of Misty. He then leapt onto land and began to run towards the starfish, who had crashed into the wall.

"Starmie, use Water Gun, quick!"

It shot a stream of water at Packrat, who was too far away to take any damage. It did manage to blind him long enough for it to jump into the water again, however. He looked at Von Stupor, who returned his gaze, then back at the submerged starmie.

"Stupor, switch me out," he ordered.

"Wha?" asked Von Stupor in reply.

"Switch me out for another pokémon!"

"What? Uh… which one?"

"It's your battle so you figure it out, just switch me out! I've done all I can."

"Right, then! Packrat, return!"

Misty stamped her foot once in anger.

"I'll now send out Spearow!" called Von Stupor, throwing out its pokéball.

It popped out and flew into the air, hovering over the pool.

"Starmie, hit it with a Bubblebeam!" commanded Misty.

An appendage poked out of the water and fired a stream of bubbles in Spearow's direction.

"Spearow, dodge it!" ordered Von Stupor.

The bird began flying around the arena, avoiding the bubble stream.

"Now Spearow, use Gust on the water! Begin forming a tide!"

The bird, while dodging the bubbles, would blow wind at the water. Eventually, a current began to form in the water. Over time, it became strong to the point that the starmie couldn't resist the torrent and began flopping helplessly around the pool.

_What to do next…_ Von Stupor wondered to himself.

"Think about it, Stupor," advised Packrat. "You got the thing helpless in the pool, and it can do one of two things, either come out onto our turf to fight, or stay down here and keep trying to attack. What are you gonna do to flush it out?"

Von Stupor thought hard. He had no clue how to do it.

"Come on, she's not afraid to use the environment, why can't you? Best of all, while that thing is distracted, you'll be consequence free for a little while… After a while, you can always whip Spearow out again to 'stir things up a bit' again, ha ha," Packrat mentioned.

Suddenly, Von Stupor got an idea. He switched out Spearow in favor of Sandshrew.

"Sandshrew, use Dig on that cracked liner there!" ordered Von Stupor, pointing towards a large crack in the floor near the pool that had been filled with a sealant.

The sandshrew marched over to it and began to dig, extracting the sealant.

"No! Don't do that!" Misty screamed at it.

Soon, the crack began to grow. It stretched over into the pool and towards the wall. In a flash, the water began forcing its way through the crack and towards the wall. The crack suddenly widened to about a foot wide and water gushed through it, soaking into the ground beneath it and outside, into the road, rolling down the hill. Within a few minutes, Misty clutched the sides of her head in horror as all but a small amount of water had been drained from the pool. Water was everywhere outside.

Von Stupor traded Sandshrew for Spearow once more and instructed a Drill peck against the exposed Starmie. Having nowhere to go, being pinned down by Von Stupor's platform, Spearow slammed into its jewel, cracking it and causing it to pulse.

Misty was too dumbfounded by the damage to the gym to realize exactly everything that happened. By now all of the gym's swimmers were piled into the room, staring at the damage Von Stupor had caused. Absolute silence filled the entire room.

"Well… I was thinking of using Psyduck," remarked Packrat. "You know, go for an underwater attack… but I suppose this works, too." He then turned to Misty and said, "Hey, don't you owe us a CASCADEBADGE?"

A random swimmer approached the two and handed them a badge discreetly.

"Here's a CASCADEBADGE… I suggest you get out of here before she recovers. She'll kill you both if you don't," she said.

Von Stupor and Packrat, without saying a word, promptly left.


	21. Boarding the Boat!

"Chapter 13- Boarding the Boat!"  
By: Von Stupor

"Okay, so we are going to…" started Packrat for Von Stupor.

"Well, Saffron is due south, I suppose we could attempt to go there," Von Stupor responded, fumbling with the pokédex.

"Right. I saw some signs for the city a ways back, so we're not far."

"Erm, Packrat? How is it that you're so knowledgeable about what to do in battling pokémon?"

"Who? Oh. I've been playing video games of all kinds obsessively for years, strategy, particularly. Over time, the application of game know how to real life just kind of happens. A little rough at first though, because at first I thought that if I jumped on a turtle enough, I'd get a 1-Up."

"…Did you?"

"…I was kidding, Stupor."

"Rrright, I knew such! Ha ha ha! I fooled you, quiaff?"

"...So we're heading to Saffron, right-"

"Yes."

By this time, they had reached the Saffron City gates. Without further delay, they strolled right on inside.

"I'm on guard duty," said the guard spontaneously as he passed the desk. "Gee, I'm thirsty though! Oh wait there, the road's closed."

Just then, Von Stupor and Packrat were roughly shoved backward due to an unseen force. They struggled for a moment to maintain balance, and Packrat shot a leer at the guard, who stood by, staring forward.

"Wait a second…" he said lowly, and tried to walk past the guard again.

"I'm on guard duty," he repeated like nothing ever happened. "Gee, I'm thirsty, though! Oh wait there, the road's closed."

Packrat, being shoved backward once more, grabbed Von Stupor's arm and dragged him out of the building.

"Packrat, but, but Packrat," Von Stupor sputtered, stumbling after him.

"No, I'm not bothering with that, we'll just go east of Cerulean," replied the rat insistently.

"Why don't you two just take the underground path to Vermilion City instead?" asked a random passerby.

"It goes underneath the city?" Von Stupor asked in curiosity.

"Yeah, it goes straight there! It's a good walk, but you'll go straight there."

"We were headed that way anyway," Packrat pointed out gesturing his head towards the passage. "Shall we?"

"Sure, why not?" agreed the baron as the two trotted off to the undergound passage.

The passage itself was surprisingly well-maintained. It was long and quiet, though well-lit.

Von Stupor pulled out some mooncheese for them and began to talk over a nice snack.

"So what's your real reason for coming to Kanto, Stupor?" asked Packrat, swirling his mooncheese bits in his mouth.

"What? I don't understand..."

"Stupor, I already know you're here for something, now why did you come?"

"I was just coming here for--"

"Stop saying that! You're hiding something, Stupor! Spill it!"

Von Stupor looked around and scratched the back of his head. Suddenly, he burst into a sprint, toward the other end of the tunnel while cramming his hand into the bag.

"Stupor, _wait!_" Packrat cried out, chasing after him. "_You're only giving yourself away!_"

"Packrat, return!" cried Von Stupor, aiming a pokéball at Packrat.

A crimson light shot out of it at Packrat, but the rodent was too quick and dodged it. He was now gaining on Von Stupor. Persistently shooting that beam, however, Von Stupor eventually managed to nail Packrat in his shoulder and suck him into the ball. He stopped for a moment to catch his breath.

"I'm sorry, my friend, but 'tis entirely too embarrassing."

After some time, he finally reached the other end of the passage and exited its end. Behind him were the southern gates to Saffron, so after checking his map, he knew he was in the right place.

He happily trotted down the weaving grassy path to Vermilion and began to wonder where the city's gym was at.

"No, wait! I must catch more pokémon first!" he thought aloud to himself, and wandered back to the field.

After walking around a bit, Von Stupor then spied an odd creature poking the back of a plant's bud. He curiously pulled out his pokédex and pointed it at the creature.

"Mankey," it said. "The pig monkey pokémon. Extremely quick to anger. It could be docile one moment and thrashing away the next."

"Excellent! I shall choose Packrat for this!"

Von Stupor tossed out Packrat's pokéball and upon being ejected, he made a beeline for Von Stupor. Surprised, Von Stupor was easily tackled to the ground. Packrat picked up the pokéball and began pounding Von Stupor's mask with it repeatedly, knowing it caused him no harm.

"_Stop putting me in freaking pokéballs!_" he yelled as Von Stupor laid there, absorbing the blows. "_I hate being in god damned pokéballs! Stop - putting - me - in - theeeeeerrrrrre!_"

Packrat got up and locked eyes with the mankey. It stared at him for a moment, then blundered away. Von Stupor got up, dusting himself off.

"You are _so_ lucky that mask is inpenetrable, you hear me! If it weren't, your face would have a permanent indent in the shape of that stupid ball!"

"You are angry," he replied indifferently.

"No shit, Sherlock!"

Packrat stamped his foot and something moved underneath it. Suddenly, the bud that the mankey had been poking turned to face Packrat. The rodent stared down at it in surprise for a moment, and was then slapped by one of its vines in his shin. He jumped back and rubbed his leg angrily.

"Stupid plant," he commented and kicked the bulb over hard.

"Go, pokéball!" cried Von Stupor, throwing a pokéball at the plant.

The ball rolled across a root and opened, pulling the entire creature into its depths. It shook for a short while and flashed its light, signaling another successful capture.

"Thou art mine! Now let's venture--"

"Shut up, Stupor! I'm angry at you."

The two journeyed back toward Vermilion, Packrat scowling the entire way. Upon arrival, Von Stupor healed up Packrat and the other pokémon; the healing process seemed to have a slightly soothing effect on Packrat's mood. They then proceeded toward the local gym. Following a local's directions, he came across the building, facing outward toward the water. The only path in was blocked by a tiny bush.

"Infernal plant! We cannot continue as our route is blocked by evil incarnate!" whined Von Stupor.

"It's a bush, dude. Let's go between it and the other bushes," suggested Packrat.

"Packrat, we clearly cannot proceed, we do not know how to CUT it."

"It's a _bush!_ Watch!"

Packrat pushed the plant to the side, revealing an easy access past it.

"I cannot do it," he argued. "The plant must be CUT. I overheard in the pokécenter of a man in the S.S. Anne who knows how to CUT!"

"What the heck is that?"

"Oh, 'tis a beautiful luxury cruise boat, just on the harbor there!"

"Don't you have to be invited to get on something like that?"

"Uh... perhaps you're right..."

"Did you really just think you could walk onto a luxury liner all easy-peasy like that? Besides, it's a freaking bush! Watch me uproot it!"

"No Packrat, _don't!_"

Packrat gave the bush a few hard jerks and it came right up. Upon its removal, loud human screams of agony were heard as a grotesque beast with a red aura erupted from the ground. It's quivering snout revealed long, bared teeth as a hint of drool dripped. It roared in a blind rage and punched Packrat square in the chest, knocking him back about five or six feet. He landed with a thud and rolled a slight bit. Snarling, it pulled the bush back into the ground and disappeared, the screaming dissipating shortly after.

Packrat gave a few hacks from having the wind knocked out of him and stared up at Von Stupor.

"What the hack hell just happened?" he asked, completely flabbergasted.

"You are defying reality, that's what!" Von Stupor berated him and stormed off toward the S. S. Anne. "I'm going to go learn CUT!"

Packrat confusedly followed. He couldn't get what happened out of his head. The more he thought about Von Stupor's relationship with bushes and their affinity for encountering the supernatural, the angrier he got. Within a few minutes, they approached the dock. A mate stopped them prior to boarding the ship. He was of average size, but fairly toned.

"Hi there, welcome to the S. S. Anne! May I please see your ticket?" he asked.

"Ticket? What is this ticket you speak of, dear waterboy?" Von Stupor pondered in reply.

"Everyone needs a ticket in order to board the S. S. Anne. Do you not have one?"

"I'm terribly sorry, I do not..."

"Aw... I wish there was something I could do to help, but I'm under strict orders."

We're not here to ride, we're just here to learn stinkin' CUT from the captain so we can chop down that bush without Beelzebub paying us a visit!" Packrat explained.

"Wow... you're a talking pokémon! I've never seen one of those before."

Packrat, in a spontaneous burst of anger, punched the mate hard in the stomach and pushed him into the water while he was still stunned.

Before Von Stupor was able to say anything, Packrat pointed at him and said through gritted teeth, "I'm tired of hearing that comment and I'm also not in the best of moods."

Von Stupor looked about for a moment and simply walked on into the S. S. Anne.

"I'll be hated by everyone either way, I'm sure..." he muttered to himself.


	22. Rival Rumble!

"Chapter 14: Rival Rumble!"

By: Von Stupor

Von Stupor boarded the S. S. Anne and immediately looked at a nearby map on the wall. mentally noting where the captain is, Von Stupor proceeded to make his way toward his or her cabin.

"Why the rush, Stupor?" Packrat asked him.

"You just attacked the mate back there and we are now trespassing. We must learn how to CUT before we are caught..." he whimpered in answer.

Rounding a corner and entering a wide space, he saw an all too familiar face.

"Bonjour! Ash! Surprise seeing you here!" Gary greeted him.

"Ah, Gary..." Von Stupor replied, scratching the back of his head. "Eh, I would love to stay and chat, but-"

"Of course, of course, I understand, Ashy-boy!"

"You do?"

"Oh yeah! I said next time I saw you I wouldn't let you go without a battle, so let's get to it! I know you've been waiting for a chance to give you some pointers and all!"

"Pointers?" Packrat interjected. "You're one to be talking about pointers, it looks like a polygon threw up all over your head!"

Gary simply pointed at Packrat with a slight sneer. Packrat returned the gesture with a scoff.

Von Stupor looked at Gary, then at Packrat.

_Eh... So close to the captain..._ he thought to himself. _It almost seems like I have no choice right now, but can I stand up to Gary? He's so far ahead of me..._

"So how's your pokédex coming along, anyway? I've already caught 40 kinds, pal!" boasted Gary.

"Gary, I shall accept your challenge!" Von Stupor announced indifferently. "I shall battle you!" _...Against my better judgement..._

"That's the spirit! Alright, then! First I'll start off with Pidgeotto!"

Gary wound up and threw his pokéball out, emitting a goose-sized bird from its inside.

"A Pidgeotto?" Von Stupor pondered in surprise. "Gads, he even has evolved pokémon..."

After briefly considering his pokémon types, Von Stupor sent out Spearow.

"Ready Pidgeotto? Use your Gust attack!" commanded Gary.

The bird began to flap its wings fiercely, building a gust in Spearow's direction.

"Spearow, match it with a gust of your own!" Von Stupor countered.

Spearow hopped into the air and began flapping its wings like mad. The two winds met each other other and after a brief struggle, it was actually Gary's pidgeotto that was knocked off kilter.

"Spearow, quickly hit it with a Peck!"

Spearow, flew back a short ways and launched itself at pidgeotto with force, landing a sharp hit in its shoulder joint. The bird dropped to the ground instantly.

"What! How did that happen! My pokémon was an evolved form!" Gary exclaimed, dumbfounded.

"Evolution is not always key!" explained Von Stupor. "Due to Spearow's aggressive nature, 'tis only right to assume that its attack power would be superior to that of the average bird. In addition, Spearow must flap its wings harder due to their size. These two factors combined result in a superior force to that of your pidgeotto."

Von Stupor crossed his arms and grinned at Gary, who returned an dark leer.

"Well, my pidgeotto still has something your stupid spearow doesn't! A more impressive move list! Pidgeotto, use Wing Attack!"

Gary's bird launched itself into the air, towards Spearow.

"Spearow, dodge it, quick!"

Von Stupor's spearow shifted out of the way of the bird's path, resulting in a near hit.

_I must be careful,_ he thought to himself. _Pidgeotto is still high in level. I can hold my own, so long as Spearow can avoid being struck by it._

"Pidgeotto, use another Wing Attack!"

The bird launched itself at Spearow with amazing speed.

"Spearow, get away from it! Build some space to move!"

Spearow allowed itself to drop a bit, moving out of Pidgeotto's trajectory. It then proceeded to run from Pidgeotto to give itself some leeway to think of a new strategy.

"Don't think you can get away from me, Ash!" taunted Gary. "Pidgeotto, now, use your Quick Attack!"

Suddenly, Pidgeotto began to glow, and like lightning, blasted at Spearow. Before Von Stupor had any time to react, Spearow was slammed clear across the room, lodging its beak into the wall and falling limp. It dangled unconcsiously as Von Stupor returned it to its pokéball. Packrat widened his eyes in surprise. Von Stupor stood for a moment, contemplating his next action. He could hear Gary chuckling.

He glanced toward Packrat, who said to him, "Hey man, the choice is yours."

"I shall choose Sandshrew for my next pokémon!" he anounced, and threw out a pokéball.

Sandshrew popped out of it and immediately assumed his fighting stance.

"Pidgeotto, use your wing attack!" Gary ordered.

Von Stupor began to sweat.

_I don't know what to do... His pidgeotto is so powerful, and none of my pokémon bear a real advantage over it..._ he thought to himself.

Pidgeotto contacted the sandshrew with a fierce crack. It returned to the air, wobbling a bit as the sandshrew rolled across the ground.

_Perhaps..._ "Sandshrew, use Sand Attack!"

The creature looked around, and seeing no real dirt to grasp, ripped up a piece of floorboard and chucked it at Pidgeotto. The bird, surprised, was struck and grounded instantly.

"Quick, Sandshrew!" Von Stupor spouted. "Hit it with Scratch!"

The sandshrew scampered over to pidgeotto, who quickly got up and flew into the air. The sandshrew leapt up and grabbed it by the feet and drug it back down.

"What in the world!" Gary exclaimed.

The sandshrew began swiping repeatedly at the bird, holding it down.

"Come on, peck at it or something!" Gary shouted.

The two pokémon degraded into an all-out melee with each other. The pidgeotto fought back with its talons, but they weren't quite enough to pierce sandshrew's hide while all the while the rodent lashed wildly with its claws.

"Stupor, looks like your friend learned a new trick!" Packrat observed, nudging Von Stupor.

"Packrat, I've lost complete track of what's going on! I have no idea what to do!" he replied.

"Look, don't lose your train of thought. So far pidgeotto is grounded, right? You have the tactical advantage, and if this keeps up, Gary will have to call it back. Also, think about what pokémon you have at your disposal. Sandshrew's been smacked a bit, but worse for wear, he's still in pretty good shape."

"Right."

Gritting his teeth, Gary called back Pidgeotto.

"Next up is Raticate!" he declared, and tossed out its pokéball.

The rat popped out of its pokéball and stared at Sandshrew fiercely.

"I don't like that thing," Packrat muttered.

"Start off with a Tail Whip, Raticate!"

Raticate leapt over to the shrew and slapped it hard with its tail, leaving a mark.

"Gah!" Von Stupor interjected. "Sandshrew, return!"

Returning to its pokéball, Von Stupor extracted another and threw it out, revealing Psyduck.

"Raticate, use Quick Attack!"

In a flash, Raticate charged at Psyduck, hitting it with a hard tackle. Psyduck flopped across the ground and landed in front of Von Stupor, unconcsious.

"That was rather pointless," Packrat commented.

Von Stupor called back Psyduck and replaced it with his Bellsprout.

"What's the matter, Ash? Afraid to send in your rat? Don't want him to get hurt, huh? That's probably why he looks so weak, ha ha!" Gary mocked.

Von Stupor looked over at Packrat, who smirked. "Keep going, Von Stupor," he instructed.

"Bellsprout, use Wrap attack!" Von Stupor ordered the plant.

It obediently launched its roots to entangle Raticate, but on ensnaring it, it bit straight through them. Bellsprout shrunk back in pain.

"Eh... try... try Vine Whip!"

Gary chortled to himself as Raticate dodged the flailing roots with ease and bit another of them in the process. Bellsprout again shrank back.

"Enough of this, Raticate! Finish it with Hyper Fang!"

"Quick Bellsprout, dodge it!"

Bellsprout made an attempt to dodge, but in rooting itself, for the Vine Whip, it was unable to move quick enough. It was caught in Raticate's mouth and it bit down on its head with crushing force. It made a squealing sound as Von Stupor frantically pulled out a pokéball and returned it.

"'Tis probably injured now..." he whimpered, pouring with self-doubt.

"My turn," Packrat said with an evil grin as his eyes met Gary's.

"You're so gleeful, Packrat..."

"I knew all this would happen. You're very good Von Stupor, this battle has nothing to do with it. It's just you're not experienced enough. You tried your hardest, and that's what makes you better. Oh, don't worry about Bellsprout, by the way. I heard someone at the pokécenter say that injuries to plants heal very easily. It never feels good, but they never really 'get hurt'. And now... it's my turn."

Von Stupor smiled. "I forgot how far Gary has progressed. Actually, it seems that you are more of a predator, Gary!"

"What?" Gary spurted, a bit confused.

"You seem like one who prefers to prey on the weak. That is probably how you progress so quickly. By forever tormenting the weak, you are able to easily win your battles and move on. However, by facing challenging opponents and spending that little bit of extra time that makes one truly strong in the long run, and builds that special bond that should exist between you and your pokémon! I should know, I've been with Packrat for a long time. And now, I shall place all my faith in Packrat, Gary! Let us see how strong you are against my trump card!"

"Listen up, you little bitch!" Packrat berated Gary. "You're gonna watch me kick the asses of all your remaining pokémon and when I do, I'm gonna march over there and slap _your_ ass!"

Gary stared with eyes like saucers.

"You're gonna eat those words!" he promised.

"_Shut up, you little faggot! It's payback time!_"


	23. An Absence in Alliteration

**I apologize for the long delay between posts. To make up for it, I have posted the next four chapters in the story that I have completed thus far. Further justifying this, they are a bit short for my taste, so you should be getting two chapters' worth in four chapters to the story.**

Chapter 15- An Absence in Alliteration.

By: Von Stupor

"Raticate, use Hyper Fang on that weak little excuse for a pokémon!" Gary shouted.

Raticate shot itself straight at Packrat.

"Packrat, dodge it quick!" Von Stupor commanded.

Packrat allowed the Raticate to get within feet before he stepped to the side and tripped it with his foot. The raticate instantly spilled, rolling across the floor, out of control.

"The best offense is a good defense, but sometimes the best defense is a good offense. You can't let your opponent control the momentum of the fight. As soon as it swings in his favor, do what you can to break it, you hear me?" he said to Von Stupor.

Von Stupor nodded inr eply.

"Good. Now just watch me swab the deck with this guy."

"Raticate, use Quick Attack!" Gary shouted.

"Quick Attack!" spouted Packrat.

Raticate suddenly glowed white and barrelled toward Packrat. Packrat promptly reared back his fist and swung it hard.

_There's no avoiding that thing, but at least I can make it worth the hit!_ he thought to himself.

Raticate first met Packrat's fist and then the rest of his body, slamming Packrat clear across the room. Packrat fell to the floor and slid across, crashing into the wall as Raticate stopped itself and rubbed its nose.

Due to the distance between Packrat and the wall and the friction slowing his speed, he lacked the force necessary for any serious damage. He got back up with a jump and waited for Raticate's next move.

"Raticate, use Tail Whip!"

Raticate ran over to Packrat and swung its tail. Packrat met it by swinging his own tail. The two met with a fierce crack, cancelling the move. Packrat then followed up with a scratch to Raticate's face. Raticate back up a bit to grab the area where it was scratched. Packrat then stepped forward and kicked raticate square in its gut. As Raticate hunched over, Packrat planted an uppercut into its face, knocking it flat on its back. In an insulting gesture, he then marched over to it and pulled out a whisker and tossed it over to Gary. It landed in front of him as he stared at it, dumbfounded.

Giving Packrat a harsh stare, he called back his Raticate.

"Go, Kadabra!" he cried, throwing out another pokéball.

"How many of those freaking things do you have!" Packrat complained.

Kadabra emerged from its pokéball and stared down at Packrat.

"As tall as you are, you still look like a giant cockroach with that thing hanging out of your butt," he observed.

"You're best off not insulting my Kadabra," said Gary with an arrogant grin. "It's a rare pokémon like you've never seen before! This is a psychic-type pokémon!"

"Oh dear," said Von Stupor to himself. "Packrat! Be very careful! These pokémon are very dangerous and quite powerful!"

"Oh, they're more than powerful... they're unstoppable! Kadabra, use Disable!"

Kadabra stared into Packrat's curious eyes. Suddenly, Packrat's limbs all went limp.

"Gah! What the! I can't move!" he sputtered.

"Now use Psychic!"

Kadabra's eyes glowed a bright red and Packrat began to lift off of the floor mysteriously. He rose into the air a few feet and then came crashing down with more force than gravity alone could accomplish. He then lifted into the air once more. Again, he came crashing down.

"Packrat!" Von Stupor cried out.

Finally, Packrat regained his ability to move. He angrily flailed his arms and legs, but to no avail.

_How the hell do I kadabra something like this!_ he thought to himself._ Kadabra! He's psychic... I bet he's Kadabra probing my mind right now... Kadabra._

Packrat rose into the air again. Suddenly, an idea came to him.

_I'll eat pancakes!_ he thought. _That will solve everything!_

Packrat suddenly dropped to the ground.

"Kadabra?" spoke the psychic pokémon in confusion.

"_Don't lose your concentration, you moron!_" Packrat shrieked, slugging it between the eyes.

The pokémon reciprocated and laid there a moment.

"Kadabra, use Recover!" Gary commanded.

Kadabra sparkled and slowly rose into the air, righting itself.

Packrat's eyes widened in disbelief. He threw a punch and it was suddenly halted in midswing by Kadabra's mind. Attempting a kick, he found that to be halted as well.

"Fear the potatoes!" he yelled.

_That will not work this time, you fool._ he heard within his mind.

"So, you're speaking to me through my mind, huh?"

_That is so, and I will not allow you to defeat me or my master's pokémon._

"Well that's too bad, ain't it?"

_For you, I would wager that it is._

"Then why do I have my hands around your neck?"

Kadabra looked down to suddenly see Packrat's hands tightly clenched around its neck.

"Looks like your little mind games backfired, huh?" Packrat taunted and squeezed.

Gasping for air, Kadabra began trying to pry packrat's hands loose with his mental power. Packrat resisted, but Kadabra slowly overpowered him and began to loosen his grip. Packrat pulled its head close and began to breathe in its face. Kadabra, making a funky face tried to push Packrat away, but this change in attention allowed Packrat to regain his grip. As Kadabra pushed Packrat, his head was pulled with him. Kadabra stepped forward to avoid falling, but still fell victim to Packrat's odoriffic breath. Focusing more on moving away from Packrat's breath than anything else, he loosened his hold on Packrat's body and let him drop. Then, using his mental power, threw Packrat's hands off of his neck. The instant Packrat hit the ground, he leapt into the air and landed a fierce spinning kick to Kadabra's head, again causing it to reciprocate.

"Kadabra, use Recover!" Gary commanded cockily. "Kadabra, Recover! ..._Recover!_"

Kadabra did not move.

"Knocked it out..." Packrat panted. "Kadabra can't fight... and is eliminated!" _How long can I keep this up? My chest is on fire with exhaustion, I'm feeling it all over... I could go on forever, but my body won't last much longer._

Gary's eye twitched with raw anger. He called Kadabra back to its pokéball and pulled out a fourth.

"This is my last one. There's no way that rat could have beaten three of my pokémon all by itself, but there's no denying it now. Ash, this is the pokémon I started out with! This one's stronger than all the rest! I don't think your rat has the energy to beat this last one!" he snarled.

"My rat has a name, 'tis Packrat, and I have placed all of my faith in him. Whether 'tis you or I that is defeated, he and I have already won! You cannot take our victory away."

"We've already rubbed your nose in it, Gary," Packrat told him. "Gloating about beating me now won't mean a thing compared to how I've been scraping the floor with all your other flunkies."

Gary stared at them for a moment, debating in his head. He regained his composure and placed his pokéball back on his belt.

"That's fine," he said coolly. "I was taking it easy on you anyway. I'l give you this one, Ash, you earned it! Next time, though; beware!"

He then turned and walked past Packrat and Von Stupor without looking back.

Packrat suddenly felt his energy return and rushed after Gary prior to being held back by his tail, clutched by Von Stupor.

"Let go! Let go Stupor!" Packrat fought for a moment and collapsed to his knees.

"Come, we have more pressing matters at hand!" Von Stupor argued.

"Gah... Whatever... learn your stupid CUT so we can get out of here."


	24. An Emotional Enragement!

"Chapter 16: An Emotional Enragement!"

By: Agent Baron

Von Stupor exited the captain's cabin to find Packrat sitting down against the wall.

"So, did you learn how to CUT finally?" he asked without turning his head.

"He was too seasick to teach me such, but he did give me this nifty HM01, which will teach it to any pokémon that can learn it."

"This whole trip is really irking me, you know that? I saw a freaking HM01 with a trainer back in Viridian! They're reusable, we could have borrowed it!"

"Well, now we have one of our own that we can use whenever we want!"

"Give me that!" Packrat snarled, approaching Von Stupor and snatching the HM01 out of his hand. Looking at it, he began shaking it at Von Stupor. "Do you know what this is! It's a beach stone! A flat rock you skip on the water!"

"No rock can be made so smooth naturally."

Packrat stared up at Von Stupor, very hard. His eye twitched as he dropped the rock.

"I'm ripping up that bush," he said calmly and walked away.

"Packrat, you must learn CUT from it first!"

Packrat turned back around with a sneer. "How do you learn CUT from a damn rock?"

"According to the captain, you must rub it all over your body, like a bar of soap."

Packrat, fists clenched, turned and walked away as Von Stupor called after him, giving chase.

Von Stupor came around the corner in time to see Packrat struggling in the arms of a very large shipmate.

"You come with us," said a second mate standing nearby him. They were both rather large men.

Von Stupor, unsure of what to do, was then approached and grabbed by the second shipmate. He and Packrat were drug out of the boat and into an alley with a truck. The mate took Von Stupor and shoved him against the side of the truck.

"Call back your pokémon," he ordered.

Von Stupor nervously obliged the man and called Packrat into a pokéball. Upon doing this, the shipmate gave Von Stupor a fierce punch to his stomach, doubling him over. Catching his head, the shipmate then slammed it into the side of the truck and followed with a right-handed haymaker to Von Stupor's ribs. The shipmate held him by his neck and began delivering several hard underhanded blows to Von Stupor's stomach. He was then thrown to the ground and kicked in his back multiple times, near his shoulderblades.

"Next time when you go forcing yourself on the ship, maybe you'll do it yourself instead of sending your damn pokémon in to do it for you. Damn little cowards like you piss me off."

The two mates walked away, leaving Von Stupor sprawled on the ground next to the truck.

Von Stupor wheezed and looked on his other side underneath the truck. Coughing, he tasted blood in his mouth.

_Internal injuries,_ he thought. _I need immediate medical attention, but I don't have the energy to move, and with no one around..._

He closed his eyes and tried to take his mind off of the pain, breathing heavily. He tried moving, but only felt intense pain shooting through his side. He concluded that one or more ribs had also been cracked. Just then, he saw a pair of glowing eyes underneath the truck from the darkness.

They were large and emitted a faint blue light. The creature moved forward gracefully, as if it were floating. It emerged to reveal a small animal that was indeed floating. It had short pink fur and short little arms. Its legs were large, bearing resemblance to that of a rabbit. Its large, round head cocked in curiosity.

"Mew," it chirped softly.

"Beautiful," Von Stupor uttered.

The creature shrank back under the truck in surprise from the sound, but within moments slowly approched him once more.

"Fear not, little pokémon. I am far too weak to do any harm you, if I had such intent."

The creature hovered around Von Stupor, observing him. It lowered its tail and touched his back, causing him to recoil and cry out in pain. It instantly pulled its tail back. It then hovered around to his face and stuck its tail in underneath his mask, feeling his facial structure. Pulling its tail out, it bent over and looked straight into to the mask's eyes, faintly seeing his through them. The pokémon's eyes glowed brighter and suddenly Von Stupor felt a soothing sensation course throughout his body. He felt his energy return and his pain alleviate. He no longer tasted blood in his mouth and felt completely revitalized.

He stood up and examined his body and found absolutely no evidence of injury. Looking over at the strange new creature, he saw it smiling at him. He slowly held his hand out toward it as it stared between his hand and his face curiously. It hovered closer and reached out with its tiny arm and touched his fingers. Von Stupor then reached into his bag and pulled out a small green towel. He held it out in offering to the creature. It returned a curious stare.

"I don't have much, but please accept a token of my thanks..." Von Stupor explained to it. "I'm not sure if I was in dire shape or not, but for helping me I am grateful. Perhaps you could keep warm with it, or find some use..."

The creature came forth and accepted the towel, observing it. The towel itself was about as long as the creature's head and body. The creature snuggled the towel warmly and smiled at Von Stupor prior to disappearing.

Von Stupor extracted Packrat's pokéball and tossed it out. Out came Packrat and he turned and stared at Von Stupor.

"I must talk to you, Packrat," he stated.

"What happened with those guys?"

"That is none of your concern. Do you want to go on this adventure with me?"

"Well, kinda no. We came here to enjoy a vacation and here we are trying to return a bag to someone we don't know the hard way rather than the glaringly-easy-wouldn't-do-it-any-other way."

"No one is forcing you, Packrat."

"Wh... what?"

"If you don't wish to journey with me, you're more than welcome to go home, or simply meet me at Indigo Plateau. So far, you have single-handedly caused everyone you've been in contact with to hate me, with the exception of Baron Von Engar, and you have maintained nothing more than a surly attitude the whole trip. I try to deal with it, but after all this time, I now tire of it!"

"Hey! Don't act like you don't have any problems! You're the one who invited me on this whole thing, and all of a sudden it's transforming from a simple vacation to this stupid hiking adventure! We were supposed to be just lounging around and taking in the scenery and now we're taking the long route on something that shouldn't be so difficult, _and you won't even tell me the real reason why!_ You don't think I have a _right_ to be a little miffed!"

"I already told you that no one is forcing you on this adventure."

"What, are you telling me to go away, Von Stupor? Is that it? Don't tempt me, man!"

"No, I'm not. I'm telling you that you don't have to come with me, this is just as much your vacation as it is mine. _Do what you want._"

Packrat thought for a moment, and a scowl emerged on his face. Sneering, he said, "I'll be in Saffron City."

With that, he stomped away.

Von Stupor sat and thought to himself for a bit.

_Well, uh... I was not expecting that._


	25. The Lightning Loser!

"Chapter 17- The Lightning Loser!"

By: Agent Baron

"Alright, it appears that my next opponent is Lieutenant Surge," said Von Stupor, observing a nearby map of Vermilion city.

Baron Von Stupor walked into the gym after healing his pokémon at the pokécenter and noticed something very peculiar about its layout. He couldn't help but notice that everything, being the walls, floor, and ceiling were lined with plastic.

_What in the world?_ he couldn't help but wonder to himself.

"Hey, you!" called a deep voice from ahead.

Von Stupor looked up to see a hugely built man standing further down the walk, amidst a few other surly-looking people.

"What are you here for?" asked the man. The others snickered.

"I am Baron Von Stupor, and I have come to challenge the leader of this gym!" he replied, sounding as brave as he could.

"Well, you're looking at him," he said, and stepped forth, smiling. "They call me Lieutenant Surge! Kid, I've seen wars come and I've seen them go, and some have even called me the Lightning American! Do you really think you got what it takes to take me on?"

"...Why are you living in Japan?"

Lt. Surge stared at him for a moment and spoke, "That's none of your concern. ...Hey kid, what's this coat on your back for? You some kind of superhero or something with that hooky-kooky mask of yours?"

"That is none of your concern."

"Touché. You're pretty quick in the thinking, kid. I like that! What's your name, huh?"

"...I am Baron Von Stupor! That has always been my name!"

"What kinda name is _that_ to give your child? You're very interesting, kid. I'll give you that. Well, if you wanna challenge me, then that's fine and dandy, but few trainers _ever_ get past me, and I've faced countless numbers of them."

"I must try my best! Running from my battles will only lead me in circles."

"I like your attitude, kid. Fine then, you convinced me!"

Lt. Surge walked over to the other end of the room and announced, "Our pokémon battles consist of battling two-on-two, one round! You lose both of your pokémon, you lose!"

"I shall accept those conditions," Von Stupor agreed, contemplating what his team will be for the impending battle.

"Fine, then! With that, I'll send out Voltorb and Raichu!"

Lt. Surge tossed out his two pokéballs and the respective pokémon emerged.

"I shall choose Bellsprout and Sandshrew!" Von Stupor responded, tossing out their respective pokéballs.

"_Crap!_ Where did you get those! ...Raichu, use Thunderbolt on the bellsprout and Voltorb, use Thunderwave on the sandshrew!"

"Bellsprout, dodge it and use Wrap on Raichu! Sandshrew, use Headbutt on the Voltorb!"

The bellsprout, not quick enough, was struck by Raichu's erupting thunder. However, the effect was null on Bellsprout's insulated body. Sandshrew, struck by the thunder wave, was unaffected and charged right through it at Voltorb.

"Voltorb!" Lt. Surge bellowed. "Dodge it, and try to Tackle!"

Voltorb easily rolled out of Sandshrew's way with its blazing speed and came around to return a blow.

"Sandshrew," said Von Stupor, trying not to laugh. "Use Sand-Attack!"

Sandshrew looked around for dirt, but seeing none, pulled up a sheet of plastic and folded it backward, toward the Voltorb. The Voltorb crashed straight into it and flopped backward a bit, stunned.

"Raichu, use Mega Kick on Sandshrew-- Raichu, no!"

To Lt. Surge's dismay, Riachu was already caught in Bellsprout's Wrap attack. Bellsprout continued to squeeze as Raichu struggled for freedom. Looking back toward the voltorb, he saw that Sandshrew had dug a hole and rolled the voltorb into it, rendering it completely immobile.

With Raichu incapacitated and Voltorb unable to move, much less fight due to overwhelming type advantage for the opposition, he had no other choice but to call back both of his pokémon.

"...I won?" Von Stupor thought out loud, confused.

"I hate it!" Lt. Surge yelled at nothing in particular. "I hate it when all they ever use is supereffective types against my electric pokémon! It's such a cheap trick to use, and they use it _all the time!_"

"They had type advantage? I was unaware!"

"Shut up, kid! Take your damned badge and just get out of here!" Lt. Surge commanded, throwing the badge at him.

Von Stupor giddily picked up his third badge.

"Thank you very much!" he gloated. "...And stop calling me kid, I'm 20 years old!"

"He's 20?" Lt. Surge wondered as Von Stupor exited the building.


	26. Trainer Tussle!

"Chapter 18: Trainer Tussle!"

By: Agent Baron

"Packrat is in Saffron City," Von Stupor mumbled to himself, looking at a map. "And my next badge is... hm. 'Tis in Saffron. I shall head there now!"

He looked to his side and saw the two mates than had beaten him down walking along the dock the S. S. Anne was harbored. He clenched his fist.

_I had forgotten,_ he thought to himself.

He began marched over to the dock and stood at the junction between it and the land. The mates, walking toward him, noticed him and stopped short.

"Didn't we just..." one of them said out loud.

"You said to me that if I wished to board the ship, then to do it myself, correct?" Von Stupor asked them. "...And not to use my pokémon? You have falsely accused me of such, your violent action was highly uncalled for."

"Your rat pokémon hit me in the face! You're responsible for your pokémon's actions!"

"He is no pokémon, you fool!"

"What? That's a lie."

"Whether I speak truth or lies, I believe we should have a more adequate chance to settle our differences, than taking a mere pot shot, don't you think?"

The mate stepped forward. "You challenging me to a fight?"

Von Stupor chuckled and pulled out his flyswatter. "_Come, arrogant sailor, and let us see who is worthy of sailing the seas!_"

"I beat you once and I'll beat you again!"

The mate walked to Von Stupor and went to grab him. Von Stupor pushed his hand down and using the momentum, propelled himself up and over the mate, landing behind him. Turing quickly, he gave the mate a fierce slap on his back with the flyswatter. The mate arched his back in pain.

The second mate tried to approach him from behind, and Von Stupor swung his foot backward, hitting the mate in his genitals. The mate, hunching over, was then hit by a hard hook from Von Stupor. He stumbled toward the edge when the first mate recovered. He grabbed Von Stupor by his shoulder and reared back his fist.

The mate swung it at him, and Von Stupor moved his head into the punch. The blow stunned him, but the mask had successfully made a fierce crack against the mate's hand.

"_Gaaah!!!_" he cried. "What the hell is that thing made of???"

The second mate stood up straight and turned to face Von Stupor. Von Stupor whipped out a mouse ball and threw it at the mate's head. The mate failed to block it, and Von Stupor came while he was distracted and slapped him across the face with his hand, then his flyswatter. The mate, unflinching, punched him square in the chest.

Von Stupor fell backward and tumbled across the dock, rolling over the edge. He grabbed it just in time.

The two mates approached him and stared down. One raised its foot up to stomp his hand, when Von Stupor swung under the dock and out of sight. The two mates looked around for him, but saw nothing. Suddenly, a thud was heard behind them and they turned to see Von Stupor land on the other side of the dock.

"He... he swung across the supports underneath the dock!" the second mate sputtered in disbelief.

Von Stupor dashed toward the two mates and threw his cope at them. Catching it, they opened it up to catch Von Stupor in it when Von Stupor went into a slide and hit both sailors in their genitals as he passed. He slid off the dock and as the second mate crumpled from the pain, Von Stupor swung under the dock and appeared on the other side. As he returned, the mate, hunched over, met him there.

The mate threw a punch, but was too busy coping with the pain for it to amount to anything. Von Stupor ducked it and walloped the mate with an uppercut, followed by several flyswatter smacks. The mate wobbled back a bit and Von Stupor hit him once more with a shoulder charge. Wobbling back more, the mate's foot slid on the edge of the dock and he slipped off, hitting his other leg on the top of the dock on the way into the water.

The second mate, still crumpled in a heap, gave Von Stupor the universal 'time out' gesture and mumbled, "Times, I give."

Von Stupor picked up his cope and left without saying another word. On the way toward the underground passage, he saw an all-too-familiar face.

Baron Von Engar stood before him, clapping slowly.

"Very good job back there, I didn't think you had it in you..." he said coolly.

"What do you want, Baron Von Engar?" Von Stupor asked in reply.

"Hm? I don't see your angry rat with you. Lost?"

"That is none of your concern! What are you here for, Engar? I have important, time-restricting things I must tend to."

"Fine, then. I'll keep it simple. Give me that bag." He pointed at the backpack Von Stupor sported.

"This is not your bag to take! It shall stay with me!"

"Have it your way!!!"

Engar dashed at Von Stupor, who turned and ran away from him. He tore back into Vermilion city, where Officer Jenny caught the two running.

"You two, halt!!!" she commanded firmly, blowing her whistle.

Von Stupor ran to Officer Jenny as Engar skidded to a halt.

"_I want that bag!!!_" he shouted, tossing out a pokéball, revealing a large, winged dragon. "Charizard, fly us out of here!"

Hopping on the beast's back, he flew away into the horizon.

Jenny looked at Engar flying away and looked back to Von Stupor.

"Come with me, pal. You have some explaining to do," she said to him.

OIOIOIOIOIOIOIOIOIOIOIOIOIO

"So you're returning this bag to Ash Ketchum? That's pretty noble of you. Why not just leave it with us and we'll take it back?" Jenny asked Von Stupor.

"I would, but I am more likely to see him along my path towards Indigo Plateau. You see, if I follow in his tracks, I will undoubtedly see him at Indigo Plateau for the finals, eh?"

"We could just take it back to his house, though."

"'Tis most possible, but... something in my heart tells me that 'tis my duty to take this to him."

"What about that other guy? Why does he want it so much?"

"I don't know! He is some strange man making a mockery of me by calling himself Baron Von Engar!"

"Sounds like some sort of teenage rivalry to me. Does he bully you?"

"I don't know him and I am not a teenager, I'm 20 years old!"

Jenny stared at him oddly.

"I cannot waste my time here, I must press on to catch up to Ash. Good day, ma'am."

Baron Von Stupor walked briskly out of the building, annoyed.


	27. Saffron's Seige!

**I apologize for the huge delay, readers. For those of you who have not yet given up on this fanfiction, as I've promised, I will finish them all! It's just a matter of time. I acknowledge my problem with staying consistent, though. I don't have many good excuses I can use to justify having not updated any of them in... months. But I do apologize, and hope that you all still have faith that the stories will be completed! I actually had a couple of chapters written that I hadn't posted yet, so I'll post them plus the new one I wrote just today. Last we left off, Baron Von Stupor had just given the two sailors who had beaten him down their just desserts, and Packrat has angrily chosen his own path towards Saffron after a brief falling out between him and his pal.**

"Chapter 19: Saffron's Siege!"

By: Agent Baron

"Perhaps you weren't listening to me, guard face. _I want in Saffron City._" Packrat nastily spat at the guard standing behind the desk at the guard station immediately south of Saffron City.

"I'm on guard duty," the guard replied. "Gee, I'm thirsty, though! Oh wait there, the road's closed."

As the guard said this an invisible force shoved Packrat back a step or two.

"_You've been doing this to me for about five minutes now, don't you say anything different?!_"

The guard repeated his statement, and as he spoke, Packrat furiously looked for something to throw at him. As Packrat now noticed, however, the only things inside the entire station were Packrat, the guard, and the desk he stood behind. As the guard finished talking, Packrat was again shoved backward, just a step.

"Don't you have a computer you use? Unless you're one of..." Packrat trailed off, realizing that the guard wouldn't hadn't once acknowledged his presence, even while speaking. Inspiration then struck him.

Packrat quickly leapt over the counter, wherupon the guard turned and glared at him, eyes glowing red. Before the guard could do anything else, Packrat swung his foot as hard as he could and kicked the guard in his groin. The guard promptly screamed in pain prior to his head exploding into burning embers.

Before he knew it, the entire guard station, along with the guard's body faded away into the air, leaving nothing behind but a small walkway where the entrance was and a large patch where grass had not grown for an apparently long time.

"This world's getting weirder and weirder every day," Packrat muttered to himself, and peered behind him to see Baron Von Stupor approaching the underground tunnel toward Cerulean City.

Von Stupor casually walked into the entrance, failing to notice Packrat.

_Jerk,_ Packrat muttered to himself, and ambled into Saffron City.

Surprised by the sudden urban environment, Packrat easily found himself lost. Looking around, he noticed that all of the residents were dressed in Team Rocket uniforms, and that from them he was receiving some glaringly observant stares. Everywhere he looked, be it in alleys or near houses, the Rockets swarmed the city, most of them watching him.

It wasn't long before he realized that a few were even following him. Amongst all the uniformity, it was almost impossible to tell. Packrat began drifting toward a police station he happened across by chance. Stepping inside, he saw Officer Jenny.

"Weren't you just in... Vermilion?" he asked her.

"No, but I hear that a lot," not looking up from the papers she was writing on at her desk. "I actually have family all over, and oddly enough we all look the same and we were all named the same."

"That's really creepy, you know."

"Yeah, I hear that a lot too-- huh?" she said, as she finally saw Packrat. She looked around the room. "Where did he go? And where did you come from, little guy?"

"I'm the one that was talking, and I can kick your butt."

Jenny's eyes widened with shock.

"And I'm not a pokémon, because I know you were just about to say that," Packrat added flatly. "Why are there Rockets all around the city?"

"Eh... er.. well, they, uh... they invaded the city," Jenny said through light stammers. "Since, uh... since I'm the only officer in the city, we uh... we were easily overwhelmed. You know, this is still very awkward talking to you, right?"

"You're the only officer? What kind of weak security is that?"

"Kanto crime rates are nearly nonexistent, okay? The Rockets are a fairly new group who are taking advantage over our lack of need for security!"

"So they're not just a gang, huh?"

"Yes, they're highly organized, and operate under one person, whom we haven't been able to identify as of yet. You would be wise not to let them catch you, either. One of their goals is to catch rare and powerful pokémon, and they'll gun for you whether you are one or not."

"They've been watching me pretty hard since I came into the city."

"Perhaps it'd be best if you stayed here, then. Are you with anyone?"

"Just some idiot named Baron Von Stupor. We had a falling out some time back, so we split apart and I'm waiting for him here."

"Ah. Well, I'll stick around with you, then. All the other citizens have boarded themselves up in their houses until the Rockets leave. They wouldn't do something like unless there was something they wanted. We're just hoping they all leave eventually."

"Well, I'll just stay here 'till they leave, yeah. Idiots."


	28. Dancing in the Darkness!

"Chapter 19: Dancing in the Darkness!"

By: Agent Baron

En route to the next city, Baron Von Stupor encountered a large cavern, labeled in the pokédex map as the Rock Tunnel.

"I wonder why they call it Rock Tunnel," he pondered out loud, stepping inside with unflinching resolve.

As Von Stupor journeyed into the cave, he noticed it becoming distinctly darker along the way, to the point that he could no longer see.

"Hm... 'Tis not a problem, I can always use this!" Von Stupor said happily to himself, pulling out the pokédex and using its built-in light function typically used for viewing pokémon in darkness to see clearly.

Baron Von Stupor blundered about, seeing an occasional pokémon here and there, but remained rather focused on making his way through the tunnel. After about twenty minutes of walking, he suddenly heard a familiar voice.

"You fool. I've been tracking your path ever since you ran to Officer Jenny to save yourself from me," it taunted.

"Baron Von Engar, where are you?" Von Stupor asked, whipping his pokédex in all directions.

"That doesn't matter. I want to talk with you for a bit."

Curious, Von Stupor aimed his pokédex straight up, but only frustrated a swarm of zubats, which flew away in a large cluster.

_His voice is coming from all directions! Where could he be???_ Von Stupor thought to himself.

"You know, things wouldn't be this rough if you would just give me what rightfully belongs to me."

"What is so special that I must give this bag to you, Engar?! You do not deserve this bag! There is nothing about it that makes it yours!"

"You see? It's not me who makes things as hard on you as they are. You bring this on yourself. But if I'm not mistaken, there's not gonna be any changing your mind, is there?"

"There is nothing you can do or say that will make me give this bag up! Nothing! If you want it, Engar, you must take it from me! It does not belong to you, and I'll see to it that you never get it!"

"Hah! I'll give you this much. You're certainly giving me good reason to beat the living hell out of you."

Von Stupor's heart skipped a beat.

"How can you possibly hope to fight in the dark?" Von Stupor asked.

"I'm always prepared. Are you?"

Suddenly, a hard blow hit him his side, knocking him off kilter and sending him stumbling to the side. Clutching it, he whipped the pokédex around, but saw nothing. Out of nowhere, another blow struck him in the back of the head, knocking him forward. Von Stupor then took the pokédex and dropped it into a cope pocket and stood perfectly still. However, a third blow hit him hard between his collarbone and neck, presumably a chop. Von Stupor dropped to one knee, then spun hard on his back into a windmill move, twirling his legs in a wide radius. He groaned in pain as the gravel dug into his neck and chest. He managed to kick Engar in his side and twirled onto his feet, but his cope wound up backwards on him.

Knowing he didn't have much time left before Engar came at him again, he took out the pokédex back out of his cope and slipped it into the bag. Putting the bag onto his shoulders, he then took off the cope and began to twirl it about, in a very graceful fashion. He heard a footstep a far ways off, followed by silence.

_Now is my chance!_ Von Stupor thought, and quickly jumped to the side. Feeling his cope get pulled out by Engar, he charged in its direction and tackled him hard. Taking Engar down to the ground, he flipped Engar's mask off and proceeded to deliver several hard blows to his unseen face before he successfully wrenched himself out from under Von Stupor. Still holding his cope, Von Stupor wildly got up and grasped for his pokédex. He then shone the light on Engar just in time for him to have found his mask and put it back on.

Von Stupor stepped toward Engar as he backed up a bit. Engar turned tail and ran in the direction Von Stupor had to go. As Von Stupor started after him, he tripped over a metallic-sounding object on the ground. Looking down and shining the light, he found a pair of night-vision goggles.

_Undoubtedly Engar's goggles,_ Von Stupor thought, and grabbed them. As he navigated the rest of the cavern using Engar's night vision goggles, he could hear Engar's frustrated shouts from inside the cave as he stumbled around without a light.

IOIOIOIOIOIOIOIOIOIOIOIOIOI

Baron Von Stupor, before long, emerged from the cave and was blinded by the bright sunlight. After giving his eyes time to focus, he saw before him signs for the next town, Lavender. As he ventured forth, he felt a strange chill tingle about his spine. Brushing it off, he continued forth into the town. The town consisted of a simple village inside of a small valley of rocks. The occasional townsfolk that walked by appeared visibly stressed. The town itself was quite small, with no real roads and simple house designs. Towards the edge of town, however, leaning against a mountain stood a magnificent tower stretching high into the cloudless sky. It was undoubtedly shorter than what Von Stupor's perspective could interpret, but even so was incredible in its own respect.

"I grow curious," Von Stupor muttered


	29. Random Rambling and the Rockets' Return!

"Chapter 21: Random Rambling and the Rockets' Return!"

By: Agent Baron

Von Stupor entered the tower and looked around. There were people inside, all with solemn looks on their faces. Some appeared visibly upset. To his right he found a woman behind a desk. She wore a smile on her face and stared straight forward.

As Von Stupor approached her, she suddenly said, "Pokémon Tower was erected in the memory of pokémon that had died."

Von Stupor stood for a moment, surprised at her sudden statement. Within a few moments, she repeated herself. She didn't appear to be talking to him, or anyone at all. Von Stupor uncomfortably walked away and the woman was then quiet.

Moving toward the stairs, he saw an oddly dressed woman standing next to them. She noticed his gaze, and simply said, "I'm a channeler! There are spirits up to mischief!"

After a brief moment of silence, Von Stupor simply uttered, "...Why?"

Shrugging her shoulders, the channeler replied, "I'm not sure. The spirits are actually always up to some mischief, but they seem much more active and aggressive than usual. There are other channelers attempting to purify the upper floors, and I have yet to receive word of their progress."

"Would it assist you if I checked for them?"

"Only if you are a medium yourself. The spirits will hide their true forms from the living, and only special people can see through their disguise and do battle with them. I would recommend you stay on the bottom floor."

Nodding silently, Von Stupor left the tower.

Seeing a boy standing immediately outside the tower, he asked if there were a gym nearby, to which the boy gave a negative answer.

"Scratch one city off my list, then," Von Stupor muttered to himself, checking the map in the pokédex. "Though if I were to take Route 8, due east, there may just be another underground tunnel I could take to get to Celadon City. I'd say there's a good chance of that... Then from Celadon, I can hit Route 16, all the way down to Fuschia... but that's a bike trail, and I cannot go on foot. Hm. Well, I suppose it wouldn't hurt to backtrack to Lavender and take Route 12. Right, then!"

Baron Von Stupor clapped the pokédex shut and began marching toward Saffron via the trail.

OIOIOIOIOIOIOIOIOIOIOIOIO

Meanwhile, in Saffron City, Packrat was becoming increasingly uncomfortable as the Rockets looked in at him through the police station's windows and continued to converse amongst themselves.

"They seem to know about you," Jenny observed.

"Well, Stupor and I kicked their shiny arses some time back in Mt. Moon, so I can understand some sort of a vendetta forming through that."

"_You're_ the ones that ran them out of Mt. Moon?? I've heard rumors about that, but I didn't think they were true!"

"Where'd you hear that?"

"It was some nerdy kid that was doing research out there, he lives nearby here, in Celadon, and was talking up a storm about how some guy and a giant raticate saved him from Team Rocket. He's pretty famous around here now, for finding a fossil in Mt. Moon."

"Oh, that's, uh... Henshin a Go-Go, or something like that."

"That's close to what he calls himself, but not quite."

"You know, I really don't care about him enough to know. Least he gave us a fossil for his troubles, though."

"He gave you a fossil? He was saying he only found one, though. Probably because he gave you one, maybe?"

"Probably," said Packrat, looking out the window again. "The Rockets aren't really around the station anymore. What the heck are they up to?"

OIOIOIOIOIOIOIOIOIOIOIOIO

As Baron Von Stupor had predicted, there was indeed an underground tunnel linking Lavender Town to Celadon City, due to Saffron's recent lockdown. Approaching the city, he could already see large buildings peeking over the trees.

_Urbanization..._ he thought to himself, stepping within city limits. "Big buildings... they're really cool!" he said to a random passerby, who in turn gave him a strange look and walked away. "He wouldn't appreciate them, he sees them every day," he muttered to himself. "Anyway! Where is that gym?"

His eyes locked onto a gigantic building a short ways down the road.

"'Tis so large... I must see what is in it!" he said aloud.

"It's a department store," said a grumpy man from behind him.

"You don't know that," Von Stupor turned and replied.

"I live here."

"How do you know that?"

"I... I live here. My house is right over--"

Before he could finish his second, Baron Von Stupor ran away from him, towards the building. Stepping inside, he looked around, and saw exactly what the man described as being a grocery store. On the other end of the store, he saw someone dressed up in a Rocket uniform.

Approaching him, Von Stupor asked, "Are you one of the Rockets?"

"What's it to you?" the man gruffly replied, facing him. Suddenly, his eyes went wide. "Y-you're that guy from Mt. Moon!"

"I am! How have you been?"

"You better not mess with us, you hear me?! We'll take you down real quick-like!"

Von Stupor chuckled as the man stormed off. Pulling a few of bottles of water from the refrigerator, he moved to the front counter to pay for his drinks.

"These do not comply with your map," Von Stupor mentioned.

"Well, some people don't want to climb all the way to the top floor just to visit the vending machines," the girl behind the counter said, smiling and ringing up the drinks. "So you're the guy that beat up all the Rockets in Mt. Moon?"

"Metaphorically speaking," Von Stupor replied.

"All I needed to see was the fear in that Rocket's eyes and I knew you were the guy. Besides, Kenshin Urameshi's description of you was so far out there, it'd be pretty hard to mistake you for anyone else."

"Perhaps, perhaps..." Von Stupor agreed, touching his mask.

"That'll be three pokédollars. So, is there a reason for the mask?"

Putting the appropriate money on the table, Von Stupor replied, "Many would call it psychological dependence; I call it a passion for fashion!"

Von Stupor saluted the girl as she giggled and walked out the door.

As soon as he stepped out the door, he found a nearby map and searched for the gym. Seeing it, he began trekking across the city, passing numerous growling Rockets along the way.


End file.
